Charity Became Church’s Salvation After Taking Shabby Sloop Off Its Hands

Since mentioning the 27-foot sloop that was donated to the Society of St. Vincent de Paul charity, I’ve learned that the shabby craft had a colorful history and mysterious crew--all while in dry dock.

The donor was the First United Methodist Church of San Pedro, which had stowed it in its parking lot “for several years,” Pastor Eric Scott says.

“Our congregation originally accepted the boat in order to refurbish it for our Anchors Aweigh program, but eventually decided the sloop was beyond salvation. We couldn’t get rid of the darn thing to save our lives.”

Scott says the grounded craft “became an eyesore and a source of constant conflict. It attracted rubbish and graffiti. It caught fire once. A squatter moved in and brought with him suspicious midnight visitors. (We may have had the only crack sloop in L.A. ... then again, probably not.)”

The pastor said his church was grateful to St. Vincent for “accepting our rummage, but we also felt guilty for taking advantage of their naivete. Then Steve Harvey tells the whole city that it took St. Vincent only a few days to sell the boat for $500! We are in agony!”

Added Scott: “By the way, we do have this giant wooden badger...”

No beating around the Australian bush: On a visit to Sydney, Nat Read of Pasadena snapped a terse warning to motorists (see photo).

Weighty proposition: Will Wild of Malibu noticed that one guy who took out a single’s ad “has a lot to offer” (see accompanying).

Speaking of sex: “When I enter a golf tournament, I expect that my handicap/index will be verified,” wrote Bill Kennedy of West Covina. “But contestants in the Long Beach Men’s City Championship had an additional requirement to meet” (see accompanying). Odd, hadn’t realized transsexuals were an issue in golf before now.

No waxy buildup for him: Mike Brennan of Pacific Palisades notes that the television show “Monk” about “an obsessive-compulsive, germ-and dirt-fearing detective,” has an appropriate sponsor: Mr. Clean.

Put it on mute! In the “Your Two Cents Worth” column of anonymous reader comments in the Palisadian Post, Phyllis Waggner of West Hollywood spotted this review: “To the blondish young lady who likes to work out at a fitness facility in the Palisades: I’m sure your mother thinks you have a lovely singing voice, but the rest of us would prefer that you listen--silently--to your music headset.”

Is it headed your way? The police log of the Coastline News in Laguna Beach said “a resident reported his cat went completely crazy.... They confined it with a laundry basket, but it escaped when they tried to move it. Animal control was advised.”

miscelLAny: Nina Brice of Laguna Woods saw a sign that read “Ear Piercing While You Wait,” which she pointed out eliminates “the pesky inconvenience of leaving your ears at the shop for a few days.”

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Steve Harvey is all ears at (800) LA-TIMES, ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 or by e-mail at steve. harvey@latimes.com.