The Warren Report: He Needs to Win It All

David Whitley in the Orlando Sentinel, trying to analyze Tampa Bay defensive tackle Warren Sapp: “He wants to be loved but needs to be hated. A psychologist easily could diagnose our patient. A desire for approval disguised as defiance mixed with getting dropped on his head during delivery. Or something like that.

“Creating enemies and slaying them has made Sapp great. But there’s a big postseason hole in his resume, and now he’s reached the defining moments of his career.

“Kill the Philly dragon and then win the Super Bowl, and Sapp forever can laugh at the world. Lose again, and the world can laugh at Sapp.”

Trivia time: Who holds the Super Bowl record for consecutive completions in a game?

Bungling burglars: Dwight Perry in the Seattle Times: “Forget ‘Beware of Dog.’ Duncan Ferguson’s residence ought to sport a ‘Beware of Booter’ sign.

“Two years ago, the Everton soccer player got his hands on one of the two blokes who broke into his Liverpool-area home, and the unlucky burglar spent three days in the hospital.

“More recently, Carl Bishop had no better luck trying to break into the same house -- and he, too, claims Ferguson ought to be red-carded for the hospitality he dished out.”

Tough guy: Skip Bayless in the San Jose Mercury News commenting on Tennessee Titan quarterback Steve McNair: “McNair, who’s closer to 240 pounds than his listed 229, shrugs off pass rushers as if they’re trying to square dance.

“McNair is one NFL player who deserves to be called a warrior. You just about have to kill this man to beat him.”

Raider spin: Nick Canepa in the San Diego Union-Tribune: “If everyone loves the Raiders as they contend, then why does everybody hate them, as they contend?

“ ‘The Raiders never get any calls,’ Oakland guard Frank Middleton says....

“But it’s all garbage. I refuse to believe the officials are out to get the Raiders, who often pay too much attention to their press clippings and say things because that’s the way the Raiders should say things.”

Strange alliance: Steve Hummer in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: “Bill Parcells and Jerry Jones is a marriage made in a Las Vegas drive-through chapel. The last time I saw a couple this incompatible, it was on ‘The Best of Cops.’ ”

Looking back: On this day in 1994, the Clippers and the Miami Heat combined for an NBA-record 23 three-point baskets. The Clippers set a team record with 11 three-point baskets in a 126-124 victory.

Looking back again: On this day in 1996, Major League Baseball owners broke with more than a century of tradition by unanimously approving interleague play in 1997.

Trivia answer: Joe Montana of the San Francisco 49ers, with 13 consecutive completions, against Denver in 1990.

And finally: Keith Olbermann of ABC radio, on a proposed reality show that would offer contestants the opportunity to fight Mike Tyson: “I’d like to suggest a working title: ‘Ear Factor.’ ”

-- Mal Florence