Does L.A. Want Our Beaches as Well?

News item: Los Angeles has secretly asked the federal government to allow it to run a commercial airport in Orange County.

Wait until Orange County residents find out that was only the tip of the iceberg.

In a confidential memo identified only as “Operation Help Ourselves,” Los Angeles officials are making it clear that their intentions to manage Orange County from afar don’t end with an international airport.

“The airport issue is important, but not nearly as critical as assuming control of Orange County’s beaches,” the memo states. “In the same way that O.C. has botched the El Toro matter, with its schizophrenic series of public votes, it also has failed to ensure proper access to its beaches for Los Angeles residents. For that reason, Los Angeles should take the necessary steps to assert its authority under the federal Neighboring County Jurisdiction Act (NCJA) of 1933.

The memo goes on to explain, often in dense legalese, that the act permits a larger county contiguous to a smaller one to “reassert any previously held authority or claim of certain key operations” if it deems the smaller county incapable of handling its own affairs. Enacted during the depths of the Depression, the act was designed to provide needed revenues and “mastery of domain” to large counties. It is believed that only a single county in rural Kentucky has invoked the act’s provisions.

Los Angeles could “reassert” its control, the memo states, because much of Orange County was part of Los Angeles County until it seceded in 1889. (“How’d we ever let them get away with that?” the memo states, parenthetically.)

The memo lays out a plan that would put millions of dollars into L.A. city coffers in its first 10 years. At the heart of the plan is a proposal to charge Orange County residents -- based on a sliding scale -- to use the beaches that stretch from San Clemente to Seal Beach. Los Angeles residents, already complaining about increasingly dirty beaches in L.A. County, would use the newly acquired O.C. beaches free of charge upon showing proper identification.

“For instance,” the memo states, “Orange County individuals would be charged $2 per day. Families would pay a flat rate of $8. People with coolers or umbrellas would be charged an additional $1 per item.”

The memo likens the residency fee to that employed by amusement parks and various ski resorts around the country that provide discounts to instate residents. “Most likely, the fees would result in a modest decline by O.C. residents in [beach usage] in some locations,” but says that drop-off would make the beach-going experience “even more enjoyable for the tens of thousands of Angelenos.”

Nor would Los Angeles residents pay to park at the beaches. “This will ultimately prove beneficial to Orange County, because of the increased sales tax revenues generated by the influx of visitors from Los Angeles,” the memo reasons. However, should revenues fail to meet objectives, according to the memo, fees to Orange County residents “could be raised as need be.”

The 37-page memo anticipates the transfer of beaches to L.A. control to be “controversial” and “likely to result in a number of lawsuits, not to mention a nasty round of name-calling. Be prepared!”

However, the memo drafters described the NCJA to be “as solid as the strongest sandcastle ever built” and impervious to a successful legal challenge.

Still, it urges caution in moving forward, while at the same time occasionally expressing disdain for Orange County policymakers. “Someone has to run their affairs, and it may as well be us,” the memo states. “If we do this smart, they’ll never know what hit them.”

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Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays. He can be reached at (714) 966-7821, at dana.parsons@latimes.com or at The Times’ Orange County edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, CA 92626.