Make a commitment

Thanks for printing Lisa Rosen’s article “The Kiss That Isn’t Just a Kiss” (May 11). Her final statement really resonates with me: “For some, sex is fine, but love is controversial.” This is the problem I see with lesbian portrayals on TV, especially this season when it has all been about two women having sex without any sort of relationship or love expressed.

For example, in last season’s “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” the Tara and Willow relationship was loving and committed. It was never played up for sweeps ratings and had many scenes of the two women talking and acting like any other couple. However, it ended in the lesbian cliche of one dead lesbian after sex (Tara) and one evil lesbian (Willow tortured a man to death).

This season, Willow and Tara were replaced by a relationship more in tune with straight male fantasies: two women just having sex. Willow and the new girlfriend have expressed no love or affection. They just have sex for the camera, most literally in an episode where they are videotaped by a gay male character, played for laughs in yet another ugly stereotype. The episodes with their first kiss and sex scenes were done during February and May sweeps to pump up the ratings.

Part of the reason portrayals have devolved this season is that gay organizations are ready to praise any lesbian portrayal on TV without much reservation. They should adopt the NAACP’s more critical stance on portrayals or we will never move beyond the stereotype of two women just having sex to a portrayal of a loving relationship that does not end in tragedy. Watching TV and movies, you would think that 90% of lesbians die by being murdered or commit suicide.

Many states are trying to pass laws to outlaw gay marriage. More images of committed gay couples with real relationships on TV would go a long way to generate “the acceptance of women who challenge gender stereotypes in the real world,” as AfterEllen.com’s Sarah Warn says, than a hundred scenes of two women having sex on camera for sweeps ratings.

Sonia Collazo

Los Angeles