A Growing Body of Evidence Attests to This Column’s Usefulness

When I wrote about the theft of several gel breast implants from an Orange County clinic, I wondered what the thief would do with them.

That brought this note from Charles French: “For many years I lived in West Hollywood and have known several drag queens who used the implants to stuff their bras for more realistic feeling and appearing breasts.” The things you learn from reading Only in L.A.

Thanks for the warning: In Texas, Doug Schiller of Riverside saw an insurance company’s billboard that may or may not have also pertained to the creature standing on it (see photo).

Such a deal: “We were excited to get a free piece of candy but wondered how we could possibly ‘rent’ a piece,” wrote Wendy Turk of West L.A., “or how we would return it for that matter” (see photo).

Actually, the sign on the right referred to videos.

Solved mysteries: Several informants told me that the rusty old chicken vehicle shown here the other day belongs to Tommy Kendall, a race car driver-turned-commentator (see photo) who pilots it around as a conversation piece.

Kendall was a four-time Trans-Am champion, though none of his victories were poultry-powered.

Aspiring to fame? Jim Endsley of Lakewood sent me the vet’s bill for his king snake -- Endsley figured a “king” could be named after only one singer. But the thing that bugs him is that the vet seemed to charge the serpent for being an Elvis imitator (see accompanying).

Recall the whole bunch: “California’s big problems are a terrible power shortage and too many grossly overpaid workers in key positions,” wrote Mike Downey of the Chicago Tribune. “And that’s just the Dodgers.”

Entrancing Orange County: The police log of the Aliso Viejo News said a resident reported a man and woman “parked nearby, and the caller believed the male subject was hypnotizing the female.... The caller said he believed they were participating in some cult activity. This happened for the past three nights.”

miscelLAny: Mention was made here of Gov. Gray Davis’ recent (startling) declaration that “we have people from every planet on the Earth in this state.” Which made Lois Lyons of Malibu wonder if the bill Davis signed allowing undocumented immigrants to obtain driver’s licenses also applies to “space aliens.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.