Quick, pull over

The road from L.A. to Coachella is lined with its own peculiar attractions. So on the way ...

1. Stop at Beaumont (about 25 miles west of Palm Springs on Interstate 10) and go thrift shopping on 6th Street in antique malls filled with arcana and Americana.

2. Stop again at the Cabazon exit for the Cabazon Outlets (“Just look for the big flashing sign,” says a local. “It’s the only one for 20 miles”). There are more than 100 stores, from Gucci to Brooks Brothers. It is so huge that you have to drive from parking lot to parking lot, because between the heat and the weight of the bags you’ll be schlepping, you’re likely to pass out.

3. If you haven’t blown enough cash at Cabazon, drop some dollars into the slots at Casino Morongo just down the road (49750 Seminole Road, [800] 252-4499).

4. Check out the windmills on the way into Palm Springs. Stop and take a picture, why don’t you. It’s sooo “X-Files.”

5. Depart Interstate 10, taking the 111 Freeway into Palm Springs. Stop at the Albert Frey-designed gas station, a soaring triangular building that is now the city’s tourist center. Pick up an architectural tour map (or check www.psmodcom.com for info on the major buildings in the area, which include Bob Hope’s round Lautner house, Neutra’s Kaufman House and a Raymond Loewy next door). Cruise through North Palm Springs, ogling the 3,000-plus homes built or designed by the Alexander company. Stop in at an open house and have a complete envy attack when you realize that fixers that sold for $80,000 in 2000 are now running $300,000.

6. Take the famous Palm Springs Aerial Tramway (One Tramway Road; [888] 515-TRAM or [760] 325-1391) from the floor of the desert up, up and away to the top of the mountain, and walk the mile-long hiking trail into Idyllwild. If you’ve been on the hunt for a black bear lawn ornament carved out of a tree with a chain saw, look no further.

7. Continue down Palm Canyon Drive, checking out the vintage furniture and clothing stores and the way-weird thrift shops -- especially Angel View at 462 N. Indian Canyon Drive, (760) 320-1733, which is populated with shirtless tweaker dudes and other assorted characters.

8. Stop into the Palm Springs Desert Museum (101 N. Museum Drive, [760] 325-7186) to have a look at the cowboy art, including works by Remington and western star George Montgomery (ask your folks who he was).

9. Check out a clothing-optional resort (if you’re gay or curious) in the Warm Sands area -- although everyone will probably be half-dressed at Coachella anyway.

10. At the end of Palm Canyon Road, just before it becomes Highway 111, continue straight instead of taking the curve to the left and head into Indian Canyons -- a great place to hike among huge boulders, dunes and desert palms. Daytime park fee: $6 adults, $4.50 seniors, students and military, $2 children.

11. Or continue east on 111, stopping at as many consignment stores as you can handle, admiring the custom-made castoffs of the rich people who live in the gated communities outside Palm Springs.

12. Stop on El Paseo Drive, the Rodeo Drive of Palm Desert, and terrorize a salesclerk by demanding black lipstick. Check out an art film matinee at the Palme D’Or Cinema.

13. Have a date shake at the Shields Date Gardens in Indio (80-225 Highway 111, [760] 347-7768) and check out their fascinating display on the sex life of the date.

14. Head past Coachella toward Anza-Borrego Desert State Park ( Highway 86 south to County Road S-22), a wild and woolly drive through rocky mountain passes. If you have the time, go all the way to Borrego Springs, wander around the ruins of an old motel on the grounds of the Palms at Indian Head and sneak a dip in the oversize pool.

15. On your way back, head west on I-10 out of Desert Hot Springs (where you can soak out the mosh-pit kinks in natural mineral waters). Bypass some true junk shops and stop at a restaurant called the Cottage, which, like the stairwell at Amoeba Records, has campy record album covers lining the walls. Keep going, and the road leads to the entrance of Joshua Tree, where you can pretend to be Bono or just hike a bit in the vast nothingness of nature.

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Exactly how big is a medium backpack?

You don’t want to walk back to the parking lot, so be advised that you can’t get into the show with anything larger than a “medium” backpack (defined as no more than 20 inches tall, 15 inches wide and 9 inches thick). Also: no umbrellas, no pets, no packed-in food, no blankets and, sadly, no stuffed animals. No drugs either, and yes, there are undercover police officers.

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And they said Traffic wasn’t on the bill

Good news: The on-site parking at the festival is free. Bad news: The traffic the show creates on Saturday afternoon might make you feel like you’ve been parked for hours.

With 50,000 fans bearing down on Indio, expect to idle for a while if you don’t get an early start on Saturday. Usually the drive to Indio from Los Angeles is about two hours, but besides the event traffic, there will be lane closures on Interstate 10 from Cabazon to Highway 111 throughout the weekend.

And even if the I-10 is moving briskly, don’t get too excited. It could take just as long for you to get from Indio’s freeway exit to the venue as it took you to get from L.A. to Indio. The city’s streets just aren’t made for Coachella-size traffic tides. CHP officials expect that last leg could take up to two hours during peak arrival times.

The CHP is encouraging people to arrive early to offset traffic caused by event-related lane closures on Indio Boulevard, beginning at Jefferson Street and extending southeast toward the concert site. If Indio Boulevard becomes overly congested, traffic will be routed to Highway 111 from the Washington Street exit off the 10.

Traffic and parking information is available on the festival’s website, www.coachella.com. Caltrans offers road information at (800) 427-7623.