He Has Nowhere to Go but Up ... or Down

There are dreamers, and then there is Kwame Nkrumah-Acheampong.

Forget for a moment that the man dubbed “the Snow Leopard” was born in Scotland but wants to represent Ghana, the land of his ancestry, in the 2006 Winter Olympics in Turin, Italy.

Forget, also, that as a skier his experience is limited to three years of “skiing” on an indoor slope at something called Xscape Snowzone in Milton Keynes near London, where he works as a receptionist.

What needs to be remembered about Nkrumah-Acheampong, who turned 30 on Sunday, is that he has only recently been introduced to mountains, which are likely to be much in evidence in Turin in 2006.

“I’m trying to get my head around mountains,” Nkrumah-Acheampong told England’s Guardian newspaper. “They are so different from the narrow slope in the indoor center. The mountains are huge and high and there are trees and shadows and lumps of ice and everything.

“And there are so many different directions to go in, you can’t decide. You can go left, right or straight on. In Milton Keynes, you just ski down.”

Trivia time: Swiss tennis star Roger Federer won 76 of 80 singles matches in 2004 and became the first man in 16 years to win three grand slam titles in a year. Who was the last?

It wasn’t an A: A 4-1 loss to Wolverhampton in English soccer’s first division earlier this month left Reading Coach Steve Coppell fuming.

“I am a man of few words,” Coppell said, “but most of the ones I said to the players began with F and S.”

A chip shot? Newsday’s Jon Heyman said that George Steinbrenner and the New York Yankees are going to extraordinary lengths to land the free-agent outfielder Carlos Beltran.

“Word is they dispatched Puerto Rican golfing legend/icon Chi Chi Rodriguez -- no joke -- to sway Beltran,” Heyman wrote.

“What effect this could have on Beltran’s decision is impossible to know. But his iron play should improve.”

It doesn’t wash: The Montreal Expos-Washington Nationals’ payroll is supposed to be no more than $50 million. That, noted Tony Kornheiser of the Washington Post, “doesn’t even pay for the Yankees’ laundry.”

Money, honey: Rather than “take a leaf blower and spew millions at him until told to stop,” Miami Dolphin owner Wayne Huizenga should try another tack when attempting to sign Nick Saban as the team’s next coach, according to Dan Le Batard of the Miami Herald.

“I really don’t spend much of what I’ve got right now,” Saban said. “My wife does a pretty good job of it, but other than that I work all the time and enjoy my work.

“My first job was at Kent State coaching the linebackers, and I made $8,000 a year. And I don’t approach my work any different now than I did then.”

Trivia answer: Mats Wilander in 1988.

And finally: Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times points out that in Brent Barry’s biography in the San Antonio Spurs’ media guide, Barry “says he would give his right arm to be ambidextrous.”