A Baedeker to ‘Sex’

And just like that, it’s over. Has sexual anthropologist Carrie Bradshaw run out of questions? Or is it that when women grow up, they stop trying to understand what makes relationships work? Probably neither, but after six lubricious seasons, the final episode of HBO’s “Sex and the City” will air Feb. 22 anyway. We look back at the close friendship fans shared with the women who made the city safe for dressing up and talking dirty.

*

Pop Quiz

1. What’s Steve’s bar called?

2. What nickname did Miranda give the ultimate vibrator?

3. What’s Miranda’s cat’s name?

4. Who is Carrie’s gay best friend?

5. What else does Carrie drink besides Cosmopolitans?

6. What’s Big’s first ex-wife’s name?

7. Who is “the idiot stick figure with no soul?”

8. What is Charlotte’s dog’s name?

9. What is code for “This blind date is a dud, I’m out of here?”

10. How many stories did the New York Times publish about “Sex and the City?”

Answers to Pop Quiz:

1. Scout; 2. The rabbit; 3. Fatty; 4. Stanford Blatch; 5. Double vodka on the rocks, Scotch straight up, martinis and an occasional beer; 6. Barbara; 7. Natasha, Big’s soon-to-be second ex-wife; 8. Elizabeth Taylor; 9. “I have to go feed my cat.”; 10. 87

*

The Stats

In 91 episodes, Samantha scored a career high with 44 sexual partners, not counting David and David, the gay couple who wanted to broaden their horizons but couldn’t go through with it.

Carrie is next with 20, including Chad, the waiter she shared one night with in the ‘80s. Miranda and Charlotte tied with 18.

*

Gynecological Crises

Miranda’s lazy ovary

Charlotte’s vulvodynia

Samantha’s gray pubic hair

Charlotte’s miscarriage

Carrie’s stuck diaphragm

Miranda’s chlamydia

*

A “Sex and the City” Glossary

Toxic bachelor -- commitment-phobic serial seducer

Modelizers -- men addicted to dating models

Gay straight man -- a heterosexual with the habits and tastes more typical of a homosexual

Straight gay man -- a homosexual who watches sports on TV and never heard of Dolce & Gabbana

Frenemies -- friends who often act more like enemies

Goody drawer -- place where sexual accessories are kept

All righty -- an unromantic response to a marriage proposal

*

Our Taste in Jewelry

From the wardrobe department straight to InStyle:

Carrie’s gold nameplate necklace

Carrie’s round, gold Bulgari watch

Fabric flower pins

Charlotte’s single strand and Carrie’s multistrand or yards of pearls

Large, gold hoop earrings

Carrie’s Playboy bunny pendant on a gold chain

*

Required Viewing

Although the series didn’t set out to be educational, women wish their men would watch the following episodes:

“The Good Fight,” wherein Aidan urged Carrie to give away some of her clothes and shoes. “Don’t mock the clothes,” she warned.

“The Catch,” wherein Harry’s best man thinks the sexual technique he used in high school is still state of the art, and Carrie disagrees.

“They Shoot Single People, Don’t They?” wherein Miranda explains why women fake it.

*

Same-Sex Encounters

Miranda kissed her friend Wendy in fourth grade.

Samantha tried a relationship with Maria, a Brazilian artist.

Carrie experienced a girl-on-girl kiss while playing Spin the Bottle at a party.

Charlotte was the darling of a group of power lesbians but wouldn’t go the distance.

Miranda’s blind date for her law firm picnic was a lesbian.

*

Most Romantic Moments

“I get it,” Big said to Carrie, “you’ve never been in love.”

When Steve and Miranda kissed in the rain, and the urban myth about the one-night stand that turned into a relationship was born.

When Charlotte told Harry she probably couldn’t have children and he said he didn’t care, they could adopt.

OK, it wasn’t romantic, but it was hot -- when Carrie and Big kissed in the hotel elevator.

*

We Could Have Done Without

Watching a pregnant Sarah Jessica Parker pretend she wasn’t.

Seeing the naked rear view of the 72-year-old millionaire Samantha bedded.

Getting advice on how to choose a woman for a threesome.

Watching Carrie chew gum as she walked down the street.

Carrie’s Princess Leia hairdo.

*

Firing Offenses

Men who dated the fab four made missteps at their peril. One man’s too small. Another’s too big. Others were shown the door when they:

Chose the wrong china pattern. (Charlotte)

Left the bathroom door open. (Miranda)

Lived in a filthy apartment with a disgusting roommate. (Carrie)

Preferred taking an anti-depressant to having a sex drive. (Charlotte)

Expressed a preference for unconventional showers. (Carrie)

Wanted to have long talks about “the relationship.” (Samantha)

Were rageaholics. (Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte)

Displayed Catholic guilt by taking ritual post-coital showers. (Miranda)

Confessed he liked older women. (Samantha)

Still lived with his parents, who didn’t allow marijuana in the house. (Carrie)

Insisted on certain sex acts. “I went to Smith,” Charlotte explained, and there are things Smith girls don’t do.

Babbled baby talk in bed. (Samantha)

Suggested an orifice bearing no resemblance to a Popsicle should be licked. (Miranda)

Were bad kissers. “He raped my face,” said Charlotte.

*

Handbag Hall of Fame

The Fendi baguette

Dior saddle bag

Vintage magazine clutch

Dior denim logo bag

The coveted Hermes Birkin bag

Gucci logo fanny pack

The jeweled Judith Leiber minaudiere Big gave Carrie

*

We Teared Up When

Miranda’s mother died.

Brady was born.

Carrie thought she had lost Aidan’s dog, Pete.

Samantha was diagnosed with breast cancer.

The first time Carrie broke up with Big.

Carrie and Big had their “The Way We Were Moment” outside the Plaza.

*

Proof That Samantha is a Gay Man

She goes to the gym a lot.

She likes to shop.

She has recreational sex, without guilt.

She always knows the hot places to go.

She often complains about how messed up men are.

*

Shoe Encounters

Guests were asked to remove their shoes at Kyra and Chuck’s baby shower, and someone made off with Carrie’s new Manolos.

Charlotte indulged a foot-fetishist shoe salesman who gave her free sandals.

Carrie’s Manolos were taken by a mugger.

Carrie lost her Choo when she ran to catch the Staten Island ferry.

Miranda’s water broke on Carrie’s new Christian Louboutins.

*

Fashion Hall of Shame

Carrie’s dirndl

Carrie’s vintage nurse’s cape

Carrie’s multicolor Chanel peasant blouse and purple tie-dyed capri pants

Carrie’s first-date look for Berger: a white nightie, raspberry cardigan and babushka

Samantha’s turquoise sequined halter top and pants

Carrie’s knit romper and newsboy cap

*

Best in Show

Carrie’s Givenchy strapless chiffon dance dress

Charlotte’s backless black bridesmaid’s gown by Richard Tyler

Carrie, doing a Jackie Kennedy turn in vintage Halston shirtwaist and big sunglasses

Carrie’s black-and-white flowered Prada skirt and baby tee

Samantha’s strapless golden gown by Pamela Dennis and movie-star hairdo

Charlotte’s tidy, good-girl dresses, like the off-the-shoulder linen printed with brown cabbage roses she wore when Trey proposed.

*

Meanwhile, in Real Life

Sarah Jessica Parker had a baby boy.

Kim Cattrall got married, wrote a sex manual with her husband, then got divorced.

Kristin Davis dated Alec Baldwin and bought a house.

Cynthia Nixon had a second child with her longtime boyfriend.