He Should Have Tried It With a Rocket

There are two words John Daly never uses when he steps up to a tee: Too far.

Until Wednesday when golf’s long-ball specialist tried to hit a ball from Canada to the U.S. over Niagara Falls.

“He attempted,” wrote Bucky Gleason of the Buffalo News, “to drive a ball off a cliff, over the mother of all water hazards.... By the time he struck the second of 20 drives, Daly knew he had met his match. [He] never reached Goat Island, N.Y., from Table Rock, Ontario. In fact, he never came close.

“ ‘It was like a wall,’ Daly said. ‘I can’t hit it any better than that.’

“It was a spectacle to behold, Daly standing atop a platform overlooking the Niagara Gorge before thousands of cheering fans. The other side was 342 yards away, but it might as well have been a mile. The event had the feel of a circus act.”

Trivia time: Why will this date be remembered as a dark day in L.A. sports history?

A league of their own? Washington National Manager Frank Robinson, who hit 586 home runs, doesn’t think any player found using steroids should be allowed to pass him on the career list.

“If it was found out,” he said on HBO’s “Costas Now,” “that they didn’t do it legitimately, then I would really be upset. Wipe it out. That’s the way I feel about it. No numbers. It’s like they didn’t play.”

Who knew? “Baltimore Orioles first baseman Rafael Palmeiro has been suspended for 10 games for testing positive for steroids,” Jay Leno said on the Tonight Show. “In his defense, he said he did not take the steroids knowingly. And today, Ricky Williams said he had no idea he accidentally smoked pot every day for a year.”

He knows: Maybe, writes Newsday sports columnist Mark Herrmann, Palmeiro was telling the truth when, seated alongside other renowned sluggers past and present, he told a congressional committee last spring that he had never used steroids.

“It could have been,” wrote Herrmann, “the sight of those successful, rich, muscular guys alongside him that made the lightbulb go on in his mind and got him thinking, ‘Hmmm, why didn’t I think of this sooner?’ ”

Some things are priceless: “Shaquille O’Neal,” said Leno, “has signed a five-year, $100-million contract extension with the Miami Heat.... Actually, they offered him $200 million if he would practice his free throws, but he said no.”

Translation? From Bloomberg news service: “Andrew Flintoff and Kevin Pietersen combined for an unbroken 102 as England rallied from the loss of three quick wickets after lunch to reach 289-4 at tea on the opening day of the second Ashes cricket Test against Australia.”

Trivia answer: Laker broadcaster Chick Hearn died three years ago today at the age of 85.

On a brighter note: Marge Hearn, Chick’s wife for one week short of 64 years, celebrated her 88th birthday earlier this week.

Finally: Antoine Walker, obtained by the Heat as part of a five-team trade Tuesday, on why he takes so many three-point shots: “Because there are no fours.”