Calling a mishmash famous doesn’t make it taste better

DOESN’T it take time for something to become famous?

KFC is famous for a couple of things: its Original Recipe Kentucky Fried Chicken infused with 11 herbs and spices, and Col. Sanders, whose spiffy white wardrobe has inspired countless fashion trends.

It is not famous for its mashed potatoes topped with corn, popcorn chicken and cheese. In fact, nowhere has such a concoction been considered famous. (In an alternate universe, maybe, but not here on Earth.)

That’s why it’s so perplexing that KFC has introduced two dishes of said ingredients and dubbed them its new Famous Bowls. One is smothered in brown gravy, the other in honey barbecue sauce.

Not only are they not famous, they aren’t very good, either.

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KFC’s Famous Bowls

Taste

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If you believe the proverb “Anything’s dandy when smothered in gravy,” you might tolerate this otherwise indigestible array of fats, starches and salt. The bowls taste as if they were invented by a college kid with the munchies, and the problem is that KFC isn’t open at 2 in the morning, when a meal like this would be most appreciated.

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Diet Watch

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Though it feels like a million calories, the gravy-topped bowl only has 690 (the honey barbecue bowl has 710). This isn’t too bad, considering all your side dishes are already mixed in, but with 31 grams of fat, 77 grams of carbohydrates, 55 milligrams of cholesterol and a whopping 2,110 milligrams of sodium, it can still mess you up several ways.

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Portability

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Bowls with lids make transportation easy, but like any fast food that requires a plastic dining utensil, don’t attempt to eat and drive. You’ll hit a bump in the road and end up with your food in your lap and your “spork” up your nose.

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Hype-o-meter

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In the commercial, an overly excited male customer and overly perky counter woman talk about the bowls’ layers of flavor. Instead, maybe KFC should have exploited the “famous” part of the Famous Bowls and shown the bowls singing and dancing, “Fame! I’m gonna live forever -- in your digestive tract.”

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* Ratings are on a scale of one (lowest) to four (best).