Traffic on PCH Stops to Ogle the Heavy Beachgoers

First, a weighty matter. The laradio.com website says that a traffic reporter on KFWB-AM (980) attributed a snarl on Pacific Coast Highway the other day to “heavy beachgoers.” I’m surprised they’d want to be seen in bathing suits.

Ooh L.A. L.A.: Marvin Mallon of West Hills was surprised that a local market would offer a recipe for brazen Brussels sprouts (see accompanying). Perhaps the sexy ingredient was supposed to be prosciutto (an Italian ham)?

Your spelling is killing me, Larry: Craig Walker of Orange noticed that a company that advertises every 30 seconds or so on television and radio should hire a spell-checker -- or your mattress is free! (see accompanying).

Inanimate drama: An exciting if somewhat puzzling crime log entry about the plight of a door caught the eye of Lela Rodriguez of Arcadia (see accompanying).

Caution -- multi-tasker in next lane: A listener told KNX-AM (1070) radio’s Bob McCormick that he was sideswiped on Laurel Canyon Boulevard by a motorist talking on a cellphone and writing in her checkbook, which she was balancing on the steering wheel.

That might seem easy for the typical L.A. driver.

But the man observed that the side-swiper was using colored pencils to input her information.

Also, she didn’t stop after hitting him, possibly not having noticed.

He said that when he caught up with her and called out, she yelled impatiently, “I’m on the [bleeping] phone!” The man, however, noticed a nearby police officer, who pulled the woman over.

In her back seat were two small children, neither of whom was wearing a seat belt. “Oh, we never do,” one of the kids was overheard saying.

miscelLAny: A few weeks ago, a pastor at odds with Ontario officials declared at a meeting of the City Council that he had placed a curse on City Manager Greg Devereaux. There’s hope for Devereaux, though. He told columnist David Allen of the Inland Valley Daily Bulletin that he later opened a fortune cookie and was greeted by this message: “The skies above will rain success onto you.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. First St., L.A. 90012, and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.