$1.5 million just doesn’t go that far

The college basketball coaches who gathered at the Los Angeles Athletic Club’s tip-off luncheon this week couldn’t resist ribbing UCLA’s Ben Howland over the new seven-year contract that will pay him $1.5 million this season.

“We were all talking about it,” UC Santa Barbara Coach Bob Williams said. “Our goal is someday to make as much as he pays in taxes.”

We’ll take this opportunity to note Howland hardly held up the Bruins bankers after two consecutive Final Fours, considering how much basketball coaches are making around the country and the cost of living in Los Angeles.

According to a salary calculator at CNNMoney.com, earning $1.5 million in L.A. is the equivalent of making about $999,000 in Columbus, Ohio, where Ohio State Coach Thad Matta will make $2.5 million under his new deal after reaching the Final Four last season. To have the same buying power in L.A., Matta would have to make $3.7 million.

Then there are the numbers if a coach actually wins a couple of NCAA titles and is tempted by the NBA.

Billy Donovan’s new contract at Florida pays him $3.5 million in Gainesville dollars. He’d have to make $5.6 million to match that here.

Gee, will somebody please buy Coach Howland lunch?

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Trivia time

Speaking of coaches whose W-2s you wouldn’t mind getting, how about USC football Coach Pete Carroll?

For today’s trivia question, what are the two Pacific 10 schools that have yet to beat the Trojans since Carroll arrived at USC?

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Hair today

Howland’s wallet wasn’t off limits for Southern California coaches, and neither was his hairline.

New Long Beach State Coach Dan Monson, who like Howland worked at Gonzaga earlier in his career, knew him back when both had plenty of hair.

“We had a contest to see who could lose it first,” Monson said.

“Ben’s such a competitor.”

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Three rings

The Kings’ game against the Boston Bruins on Friday at Staples Center was sponsored by Cirque du Soleil.

And we thought only the Lakers were a circus.

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Owner on owner

Dallas Mavericks owner and ballroom dancer Mark Cuban, a guest on “The Dan Patrick Show,” had this take on Lakers owner Jerry Buss’ saying this week he “would certainly listen” to trade offers for Kobe Bryant.

“It means something’s going on between them,” Cuban said. “One of the great things about Jerry Buss, who is probably the owner I admire the most, is that he’s a communicator.

“And you know, Jerry hasn’t told me this, but my guess is he’s really trying to figure out how to turn over the reins to whoever he thinks will be taking over the team from him. And I guess he thinks things didn’t go the way he wanted them to, so he’s stepped back in. But if Jerry’s saying anything about the situation with Kobe, it means Jerry’s talking, and something’s come up.”

Cuban also said it’s difficult to get equal value for a player such as Bryant.

“Look at the big trades, whether it was [Kevin] Garnett or Allen Iverson, you can’t -- and this is no disrespect to anybody -- you can’t say they got equal value.”

Other wisdom from Cuban:

“Ballroom dancing is a sport.”

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Trivia answer

Today’s opponent, Arizona, and Arizona State.

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And finally

Cal Poly San Luis Obispo Coach Kevin Bromley took his basketball team on an Australian tour this off-season and ended up Down Under on the first Sunday in September, Australia’s Fathers Day.

To hear Bromley tell it, one of his players was eager to get to a phone and call his dad.

“Son,” Bromley said he told him. “You’re a few months late and a continent off.”

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robyn.norwood@latimes.com