Hey, Ma! You’ll never guess what a cookie just told me
The discussion here of the origin of fortune cookies reminded Jane Toth of Carpinteria of the time her parents visited New York and “went into a Jewish deli for lunch. They found an item called the Hoo Ha Plate -- a variety of Chinese-style appetizers. After enjoying their meal, they opened their fortune cookies, and Mom couldn’t stop laughing after reading hers. It said: ‘For what are you reading this. . . . Better you should listen to your mother.’ ”
--
Who says the real estate market is drying up?
You wouldn’t know it from the sign that Paul Schowalter spotted (see photo).
--
Don’t you dare call this a hot property
Rosalie Gilford, meanwhile, noticed that a West Los Angeles house had a rather racy section (see accompanying). But that’s West L.A. for you.
--
Unrelated item!
On a Silver Lake sidewalk, John Rabe chanced upon an unusual name. At least I assume that “Carnal” was a name, not part of a job title (see photo).
--
Up the down staircase
In a gift shop, Mary Becker of Grand Terrace came across some confusing written directions, further complicated by dueling arrows (see photo).
--
Why should the media have all the fun?
Occasionally, businesses deliver commentary to the public. Several decades ago, a comedy spot called the Loser’s Club would designate a “Loser of the Week” on its La Cienega Boulevard marquee. The honor could go to anything in the news, from a disgraced politician to an inept sports team.
In the 1990s, Long Beach merchant Al Greenwood, who called himself the Bedspread King and appeared in a crown and a robe, would throw topical wisecracks into his ads. Once he recommended that, instead of soldiers, the U.S. dispatch overseas “a valuable strike force that our country has never utilized -- our L.A. gang member street brigade.”
Greenwood, who passed on, has been succeeded by the 99 Cents Only Stores chain, which always has something to say about current events. In a recent ad, the company ran a blank box with a caption that said, “In support of the writers’ strike, 99 Cents Only has nothing funny to say this week.”
If this doesn’t bring about an end to the strike, nothing will.
--
Weak Explanation of the Week
This involved a guy who was loitering near railroad tracks in Carpinteria and grabbed a backpack and hid when he saw police.
It turned out that he had several bottles of prescription medicine bearing a woman’s name.
He told police the bottles belonged to a girlfriend. She was contacted and assured police it was true, the Coastal View News reported.
She helpfully added that “she had kissed him, thereby transmitting her illness to him.” Thus, she said, he required the same medication.
He was arrested for possession of a controlled substance.
--
miscelLAny
In a recent article in The Times, Kris Kristofferson was quoted as saying: “The No. 1 rule of the road is never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.”
Novelist Nelson Algren said something along those lines in the 1950s, adding two other warnings: “Never play cards with a man called Doc. Never eat at a place called Mom’s.”
--
Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012, and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.
