A grieving boy moves forward

When Juan Carlos Hernandez’s mother passed away from gastrointestinal cancer almost two years ago, he sank deep into the second and fourth stages of grief: anger and depression.

He refused to eat dinner. He locked himself in the bathroom for hours. He often burst into tantrums, screaming, “It’s not fair! All the other kids have mothers! Why can’t it be me? Why can’t it be us both?”

“I was this close to going back to Guatemala,” his father, Cesar Hernandez, said through a translator. “I even had my passport and everything ready. I was so sad from the loss of my wife, and he was so rebellious. I just wanted to go back.”

But the gentle-eyed 9-year-old boy sitting on the couch at the Lakers’ Reading Room of Harmony of Los Angeles (HOLA), a community center for underprivileged kids, is meek and soft-spoken. He swings his legs from time to time, a good-natured smile on his face, daydreaming of soccer until he is asked a question.

Juan Carlos has changed a lot, Hernandez said, since he joined the HOLA afterschool program a few months after his mother’s death and attended two sessions of camp provided by HOLA and donations from foundations such as the Los Angeles Times Family Fund.

About 20 months of social activities and many counseling sessions later, the sad and confused boy has learned to reach the final stage of his grief: acceptance.

“Before, whenever he thought about his mom, he got really sad and angry,” Hernandez said. “But now, he’s able to talk about these things with me, because of the changes in him.”

Indeed, Juan Carlos is now constantly praised by his teachers for being well behaved and having improved socially and academically.

He has been awarded medals for excellent performance on the California Standardized Test in math and language arts. He loves school and camp and has made many new friends.

“Right now, he helps me as much as I help him,” Hernandez said. “Both of us have been helping each other during these tough years. He’s been so good with his behavior and his studies. It’s so obvious how much he’s changed.”

Now, Juan Carlos can look forward. He wants to be a professional soccer player. In fact, Juan Carlos is ready to dash out now.

“We’re going to play soccer,” he said. And he leads his father out the door.

Through the generosity of Times readers, along with a match by the McCormick Foundation, more than $1.6 million was granted last year by the Los Angeles Times Summer Camp Campaign.

The Summer Camp Campaign, part of the Los Angeles Times Family Fund, a McCormick Foundation Fund, supports programs that provide thousands of Southern California’s at-risk children ages 7 to 17 with enriching, educational and fun camp experiences.

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sophia.lee@latimes.com