If your Thanksgiving turkey is still in the freezer, Stephen Colbert's cooking advice definitely will not help you. On Tuesday's episode of "The Late Show," Colbert showed why he is more suited for late-night TV than giving advice at the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line.
"I know a lot of you are stressed about making the meal for the family," Colbert said to introduce the segment. "That's why it's so important to get accurate information on turkey preparation."
He then revealed that this year, he visited a Butterball call center to help out at the Talk-Line, "a toll-free number you can call to speak to an expert who really knows what they are talking about."
Of course, Colbert is not quite a turkey expert. But after a short training session with a Butterball veteran, Colbert was seated at his station, ready to help Thanksgiving cooks in need.
"Butterball hotline, let's butter your balls," said Colbert on his first call.
"I like it well done. How would you suggest I cook it?" asked the caller.
"A long time," quipped Colbert. "Cook it a long time."
And that was perhaps Colbert at his most helpful. He later warned a caller that her turkey was about to explode, questioned another about stuffing versus dressing and even tried to convince one that he was an air-traffic controller.
Watch the full clip above.