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PARTY OF NO! No Mrs. Michael Jackson; no KStew-Jesse James mistress link; no more music from Miley Cyrus

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The Ministry of Gossip is throwing a little ‘party of no’ -- or maybe it’s a ‘party of know’ -- as we close out the week. Grab what you want from the fridge, there are snacks out on the patio, and you can grab a seat anywhere.

Now seems like a good time to get a few things straight, no?

There is no secret Mrs. Michael Jackson, the singer’s estate reports to the court. This should upset a few folks who’ve sent a few e-mails. You know who you are. TMZ

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Similarly, there is no Christmas-dinner BFF link between ‘The Runaways’ star Kristen Stewart and self-reported Jesse James Mistress No. 3, Brigitte Daguerre. Gossip Cop

Also, no good reason to hang around Jesse James’ West Coast Choppers with a camera. CBS News

No sign of Sandra Bullock. Celebrity-Gossip.netNo reason to worry your text messages will be sold to a tabloid. Tiger Text

No divorce brewing for Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott. OK! Magazine

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No place like (a new) home for Susan Boyle. People

Also, no more music from Miley Cyrus after her June release. She’s all about movies now. E! Online

Hopefully that’s enough oppositional behavior to get you through the night. Let’s toast to a good weekend, shall we?

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-- Christie D’Zurilla

Think the Ministry is really done? The answer would be no!

No, Beyonce isn’t pregnant No, MTV didn’t ban ‘Telephone’ No truth to the rumor that Kristen Stewart can’t smile

Want the headlines? Don’t say no! Follow us on Twitter (we’re @LATcelebs) or become a fan on Facebook.

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