Kings’ Fan Fest: A comedy team is born

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The Kings’ first Hockey Fest, which kicked off Friday night with a pep rally and introductions of dozens of current and former players, got into full gear today.

The first panel session became a laugh fest, with Teddy Purcell, Wayne Simmonds, Matt Greene (pictured above during a pregame skate) and Anze Kopitar answering questions from kids. Yes, Simmonds told one earnest listener, it’s always OK for a hockey player to suck his thumb. Purcell was asked if he had any kids and if so, do they play hockey.

‘No,’ he said, taking on a mournful expression, ‘and my girlfriend dumped me.’

That drew groans of sympathy from the few hundred fans in the audience, as well as his teammates.

Greene was asked how many stitches it took to repair a cut he suffered last season when he was hit in the face by a puck. Only seven, he said, ‘but they couldn’t do anything for my nose. It’s still crooked. And I still have no girlfriend.’

Kopitar was asked who was a better player, his brother, Gasper, or Greene. While Kopitar tried to formulate an answer, Greene jumped in.

‘He has better hands, more talent and a better upside,’ Green said. ‘I’d sign him today. And he probably has a girlfriend.’

Three panel discussions are scheduled for later today at the Nokia Theatre: NHL experts, with Ray Ferraro, Jim Fox and Kelly Hrudey; the enforcers, with Brad Norton and Stu (the Grim Reaper) Grimson, and a reunion of the Triple Crown line of Marcel Dionne, Dave Taylor and Charlie Simmer.

In a 35,000-square-foot tent atop the parking garage across from Staples Center, Kings players were signing autographs, fans were testing their shooting skills and the NHL’s classic trophies were on display for a respectable late-morning crowd.

The biggest attraction was defenseman Drew Doughty, who was signing autographs and posing for pictures. The line to get to him was about an hour long, but no one seemed to mind.

‘Well worth the wait,’ said Eric Marenoff of Simi Valley, patiently awaiting his turn with his wife, Mary. They’ve had season tickets for seven years and aren’t shy about proclaiming their love for the Kings: Mary’s fingernails and toenails were painted the same purple as the Kings’ uniforms, and she had a Kings tattoo above her right ankle. She also carried a license plate with the word ‘HOCKYQN,’ her nickname.

She has been through a lot of losses, ‘but some gains,’ she said.

Eric Marenoff said he has enjoyed the event and hopes it’ll be back next year. This is the Kings’ first try at a major off-season event that they hope will keep fans’ interest alive until the season begins in October.

‘It’s an awesome thing,’ Eric Marenoff said. ‘I was thrilled to see all of the old players there [Friday], just to see the alumni in one place, at one time.’

Joe Boccuzzi of Huntington Beach, carrying a friend’s hockey stick to get some autographs and a signed picture of Michal Handzus that he intends to keep for himself, also said he hopes the Kings repeat this event and expand it in the future.

‘It’s a great event for serious hockey fans, especially Kings fans,’ said Boccuzzi, a Midwest native who has been a Kings fan since 1988 and a season ticket-holder since 2001 ‘After they get this first year under their belts it’s going to turn into something just as exciting as the other teams have developed theirs into.’

More later from the afternoon events.

-- Helene Elliott