‘Poverty Mentality’ : Attitude Holds Women Back, Therapist Says

Many women have a “poverty mentality” that keeps them from attaining emotional, financial and professional success, according to psychologist Tessa Albert Warschaw.

She contends that getting what you want depends upon the kind of belief you have in yourself.

The “poverty mentality,” according to Warschaw, is the conscious or unconscious decision women make to deprive themselves of the very things they work so hard to achieve.

For example, a woman in a divorce case who “goes for the kill” on alimony may hastily hire the wrong attorney to represent her. Or a woman, in seeking a new job, may asks for a smaller salary than she could receive.

View on Success

Warschaw gives her view on how to achieve both financial success and emotional happiness in her recent book, “Rich Is Better,” published by Doubleday.

“As a professional therapist, I sensed a recurring theme during my sessions with female patients,” said Warschaw, 51, who also wrote the best-selling book, “Winning by Negotiation.”

“It was a sense of deprivation, a state of neediness that was expressed from the most successful professional woman to the up-and-coming young executive to the wife and mother who works at home.”

The book contains exercises, evaluations and tests to help women escape the “poverty mentality.”

Warschaw, who maintains private therapy practices in both New York and Los Angeles, said that in order to break out of any defeatist attitude, women must stop blaming men or society and start charting aspirations to be achieved within a realistic time period.

Get Off Sidelines

“Can we blame men?,” Warschaw asked. “We, as women, sometimes don’t act fast enough. We must stop sitting on the sidelines of life.”

Warschaw advocates developing a strategy, brainstorming, plotting one’s goals on paper and then returning to the series of charts, graphs and exercises to record personal growth.

Warschaw, who also is a corporate consultant, said that “Rich Is Better” is really a book about attitude, not about money.

“Insight about yourself is the first step, but it’s not the only step.” Warschaw said. “Insight doesn’t change anything unless it’s coupled with action.”