Coach of Jazz Zeroes In on Bowl of Chili

Remember when Utah Jazz Coach Frank Layden walked out of a Laker game at the Forum last season because he couldn’t stand to watch any more of the slaughter?

According to Portland Trail Blazer Coach Jack Ramsay, who writes a column in the Portland Oregonian, Layden went straight to the coffee shop at the Airport Park Hotel where he ordered a bowl of chili.

He was fed up, but he hadn’t lost his appetite.

“They stop serving the chili at 10 o’clock,” Layden said, “but I was able to beat the deadline and get my order in.”

The chili must have hit the spot, because Layden made a return trip this season. This time, he had been thrown out of the game by official Bruce Alexander for a pair of technicals.

Layden got the second one for inscribing a huge zero on his coaching clipboard, indicating what he thought of Alexander’s work. When he showed it to Alexander, he was gone.

As he was leaving, Layden stopped by Alexander and inscribed another zero inside the first one.

“You get two zeros because I’m general manager, too,” he said.

Trivia Time: There are four members of the Pro Football Hall of Fame named Brown. Who are they? (Answer below.)

Terry Pluto of the Akron Beacon Journal, on the picks set by 6-8, 277-pound Lonnie Shelton of the Cleveland Cavaliers: “A guy needs a travel agent and two bus tickets to get around them.”

Says Ish Haley of the Dallas Times Herald: “When Shelton retires, he will be subdivided into a condominium.”

If Walt Hazzard was misunderstood, blame it on Pooh Richardson. The UCLA guard was taking such a loud shower Saturday night he was drowning out Hazzard in the press conference after the 109-64 victory over Miami.

When members of the media compared notes later, they found they could not agree on just what Hazzard had said about wanting his team to develop a killer instinct.

Tape recordings picked up nothing but Pooh. Was it “Step on their throats and cut their hair off” or “Step on their throats and cut their heads off”? The vote was split and both versions were published.

Tracy Dodds of The Times went with the scalping version. But Hazzard said Monday that both were incorrect. He said, “Step on their throats and cut their air off.”

Said Dallas safety Dextor Clinkscale when asked if he ever dreamed the Cowboys could give up 44 and 50 points in games in the same season: “No, I dream about girls.”

Trivia Answer: Paul Brown, Jim Brown, Roosevelt Brown and Willie Brown. Roosevelt was an offensive tackle for the New York Giants. Willie was a defensive back for the Raiders and now is an assistant coach with the club.

Quotebook

Frank Layden, summing up his days at Boys High School in Brooklyn, an all-boys school: “Great teachers, wonderful athletic program, strange proms.”