West L.A.’s Apple Pan: A Wholesome Slice of Americana

When Thomas Wolfe said “You can’t go home again,” he obviously hadn’t eaten at the Apple Pan in West Los Angeles. Because, whether you were brought up in a permissive Jewish household or by staunch Baptist code, the Apple Pan always feels like home.

“You can wear a T-shirt or get dressed up,” says Gordon Teske, 42, and universally known as Gordie. “Wear a tie, don’t wear a tie.” Whatever you wear, it’s always reassuring to see Gordie. An Apple Pan waiter for the past 20 years, Gordie is one of the rare constants in life. He never changes. Come to think of it, neither does the Apple Pan.

Weekend nights always bring hungry crowds lined up against the womb-like, wooden walls, waiting for the next available seat at the horseshoe counter. The hamburgers and pies are always delicious. The coffee is the smoothest you’ll ever swallow. Steak burgers go for $2.85; apple pie “per cut” is $1.60. And, says Gordie, “everybody comes in happy.”

With good reason. What could be happier than escaping from the outside world--a world where uncertainties and mini-malls spring up overnight--into the swinging front doors of this tiny cabin, this urban oasis with its enveloping aromas, big ceiling fans, cozy lighting, plaid wallpaper and huge brick grill.

Very Homey

“I just love the way you can watch them make the hamburgers,” sighs one woman, referring to the big open grill, the nucleus of the place. “You can see the pies all lined up through that window. It’s very homey.”

Established in 1947, the Apple Pan still hangs in that time period. If you order a Coke, you’ll get it in a postwar glass bottle. Cream for your coffee really is cream, served in little open cylinders. “It kind of reminds me of ‘Saturday Night Live,’ ” says Gabrielle Siemion, 15. “That ‘cheeseburger, cheeseburger’ skit,” she says, referring to the vintage skit starring John Belushi as a counterman in a hamburger joint.

Gabrielle was only 5 when that skit was written. She was non-existent when the Apple Pan first sprung up, but no matter--this place is like a familiar friend to her. “I’ve been coming here since I was little,” she says. “I always run into people I haven’t seen in years.”

Her friend, Elinor Leventhal, 16, associates it with family. “I usually come here with my dad,” she says. “But he’s away right now. I like their hamburgers and their apple pie--oh no!” Leventhal says, ending with a current teen-age non-sequitur.

Perched at the counter, you feel as if you’re sitting in your mother’s kitchen. But instead of slopping up cereal, brow furrowed at the important words on the back of a cereal box, you find comfort in devouring your messy hickory or steakburger over the Zen-like, simple words on the laminated menu. “Quality forever,” it reads at the top.

Keeps the Cup Full

Before you can utter the words “all-American,” Gordie places a paper-wrapped hickory burger in front of you with a satisfying “smack.” It’s full-bodied. It remains vertical with no visible means of support.

You drain your coffee cup. Gordie telepathically appears before you, whisks away your empty coffee cup then instantly returns it filled with hot brew.

Now it’s time to go. Reluctantly you swivel out of your red leather seat. Gordie adds up your bill with a pencil he brought from home. You go to make a phone call. Should you need to write something down, little squares of white paper hang patiently from a nail in the phone booth.

Finally, you force yourself back out those swinging front doors. The night-time chill prickles your skin. You look back: Gordie still hustles and bustles--and your seat is already taken.

The Apple Pan, 10801 W. Pico Blvd., Los Angeles, (213) 475-3585.