LOSING HIS BITE

Since Lorraine Gary gets her first top billing in “Jaws: The Revenge,” we skimmed reviews to see how the critics treated her. Kinda mixed: Daily Variety said she “nicely reprises her role as the now-widowed Ellen Brody”; the New York Times praised “some affecting moments.” But the Boston Globe felt “the verdict is still out on whether Gary’s or the shark’s performance is the most unbelievable.”

Actually, Bruce the Shark--who got raves in the original “Jaws”--got more attention (largely pans) than just about any human. The Her-Ex accused him of looking like a “Styrofoam float.” The Register claimed that “the shark is about as believable as a slow-moving pile of old newspapers.” And the Globe complained, “In spite of (director Joseph) Sargent’s quick cutting, it’s still apparent that the shark has loose teeth and old, rubber gums.”

Universal did uncover one apparent rave for its print ads: “ ‘Jaws’ strikes again . . . more chillingly than ever!” from UPI’s Vernon Scott. We were so surprised, we asked Scott how much he really like the latest shark saga.

“It’s not ‘Gone With the Wind,’ ” he said. “I said it was ‘chilling.’ ”