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MOVIE REVIEW : ‘MUNCHIES’ BARELY WHETS THE APPETITE

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If you weren’t bitten by “Jaws the Revenge” or stung by “The Fly,” then don’t nibble on “Munchies” (citywide).

Concorde Picture’s latest quickie is a shameless poke in the ribs at “Gremlins,” itself a parody of cheapie horror movies from America and Japan. The obvious question: How do you parody a parody? The screen result suggests it’s either a fruitless pursuit or a quest better suited to facile minds.

The story begins in make-believe Peru where anthropologist Simon Waterman (Harvey Korman)--a proponent of alien visitation to early advanced societies--and his teen-age son Paul (Charles Stratton) are hoping to dig up evidence to support the professor’s crackpot notions. Fortuitously, a cute, cuddly piece of terry cloth jumps into a duffel bag to gobble down a chocolate bar. Winging back to the United States, eluding any curiosity about the guttural chipmunk sounds emanating from the luggage, gliding past customs, father and son arrive home.

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Simon must concoct a method to turn the Munchie, dubbed Arnold, into some cash. Meanwhile, his brother Cecil (Korman in a bad, big, bushy wig), the entrepreneurial czar of a fleaspeck of a Southwestern town, will do anything to stop that from occurring. Paul simply wants to make up for lost time with his girlfriend.

Cecil gleefully kidnaps the Munchie. But, when his back is turned, it goes from cute to nasty. Arnold affects the worst teen-age traits, chauvinistic attitudes and antisocial behavior. Efforts to stop him by force only compound the problem. Knives and bullets are momentary retardants as he clones into increasingly noxious brats.

“Munchies” (MPAA rated PG for language and some violence) has a proven premise and a breezy pace. What it lacks is an appreciation for the innate humor in presenting what look like clothing remnants as venal predators. An unexpected result, considering producer Roger Corman’s legendary ability to imbue bargain-basement productions with witty ideas and create such tongue-in-cheek gems as the original “Little Shop of Horrors” and “Deathrace 2000.”

Debuting director Bettina Hirsch (who edited “Gremlins”) mysteriously prefers to view Lance Smith’s broadly written script as the stuff of serious drama. She repeatedly goes for verisimilitude when a pie in the face is the appropriate tone. To paraphrase “Eating Raoul”: It’s amazing what you can undo when you treat “Munchies” like top sirloin.

‘MUNCHIES’

A Concorde Pictures release. Producer Roger Corman. Director Bettina Hirsch. Screenplay Lance Smith. Art director John Ballowe. Munchies created by Robert Short. With Harvey Korman, Charles Stratton, Nadine Van Der Velde, Alix Elias, Charlie Phillips, Hardy Rawls, Jon Stafford.

Running time: 1 hour, 24 minutes.

MPAA-rated: PG (parental guidance suggested).

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