Meals-on-Wheels Had to Put Brakes on Attendance at Gala

Who would ever guess that so gracious a motto as “None are ever turned away just because they cannot pay” could slip into the twisting fingers of irony?

This slogan belongs to Senior Adult Services, sponsor of the county’s Meals-On-Wheels program, which benefited to the tune of more than $100,000 from the 11th annual “Tribute to the Golden Years” on Nov. 11 in the International Ballroom at the San Diego Hilton.

The ironic circumstance--not at all displeasing to Senior Adult Services officials or banquet committee members--was that the Meals-On-Wheels fund-raiser was forced to turn away nearly 100 people who were only too willing to pay $100 apiece for the chance to join in applauding Police Chief Bill Kolender and his wife, Lois, as the organization’s Couple of the Year. More than 700 attended.

At the center of this milling maelstrom of formally dressed well-wishers were the Kolenders, who served as chairmen of last year’s banquet and seemed not the least dazed by the congratulations that showered down on their shoulders like ticker tape in a Broadway parade.

“This is a good end to a day that started on shaky ground,” said Lois Kolender. “It’s been a very eventful day that started at 9 a.m. when the co-producer of ’60 Minutes’ came to our house.” (A crew for the CBS investigative news program was in San Diego filming a story on the Sagon Penn case.)

To the running joke of the cocktail hour--that the couple had accepted the honor so they could get Meals-On-Wheels, which primarily benefits the elderly, for free, Bill Kolender responded, “I’m only that old on the inside.”

Many Use Service

Although the Kolenders are unlikely to become Meals-On-Wheels clients, 550 county residents do benefit from the service, which delivers a hot lunch and cold supper to people unable to prepare proper meals for themselves.

According to Senior Adult Services, the “average” client is an 81-year-old widow of limited income who lives alone, although the youngest clients are in their 20s and a few are centenarians. The daily cost of providing the Meals-On-Wheels service is $7.50 per client, and subscribers are asked to pay $5 per day; those who cannot afford this amount pay less or, in some cases, nothing. Hence the organization’s motto.

Agency board President Priscilla Simms said that the local meals program is one of the few in the country that does not accept federal funds.

“We’re completely privately funded,” Simms said, explaining that donations and the annual banquet keep the program in operation. “Tonight’s turnout says to me that this is a sharing and caring community that wants to do what it can to help seniors.”

Gala chairmen Tawfiq and Richel Khoury arranged for a dinner of roast tenderloin of beef and white chocolate mousse in raspberry sauce that followed Bishop Leo T. Maher’s invocation. The ensuing speeches left plenty of time for leisurely dining, as well as for dancing to the Danny Hale Orchestra.

Among the speakers were Senior Adult Services Executive Director Barbara Bright; Helen Copley, publisher of the San Diego Union and Tribune, who presented the “Couple of the Year” award to the Kolenders, and County Supervisor Brian Bilbray, who presented the couple a county resolution written in their honor. Ron Reina served as master of ceremonies.

The guest list included past banquet honorees, including Charlotte and S. Falck Nielsen, Anne and Michael Ibs Gonzalez, Evelyn and George Scott, and Amy and Brute Krulak. Among other guests were Councilman-elect Ron Roberts and his wife, Helene; Councilwoman Abbe Wolfsheimer; Jeanne Brace; Carol and Mike Alessio; Mary and Bruce Hazard; Jane and John Murphy; Jane and Herb Stoecklein, and Marvia and Clair Burgener.

Among committee members were Betty Tharp, Junko and Larry Cushman, Alice Zukor, Marge O’Donnell, Polly and Lawrence Foster, James Frampton, Alan Bonine, Tommi and Bob Adelizzi, Jean and Al Anderson, Norma and Sam Assam, and Florence and Sanford Goodkin.

Linda Smith and the sizable committee that helped her mount the premier MEND (Mothers Embracing Nuclear Disarmament) Ball at the Sheraton Harbor Island’s Champagne Ballroom looked cool and calm Friday despite all the little difficulties and near-disasters that normally attend a first-time fund-raiser.

The one really nasty shock of the day came when the driver dispatched to the airport to fetch New York band leader Peter Duchin returned with an empty limousine. Duchin turned up on the next flight, however, his practiced fingers eager to test the keyboard of the special piano that had been provided him.

The MEND committee earlier had been forced to come to terms with the size of the party, which at 155 guests was considerably smaller than had been hoped for. Taking the “glass is half-full” approach typical of MEND, the group cleverly turned the situation to its advantage by partitioning the ballroom into a rather small space, so that it seemed like one of the lively, glamorous clubs that used to light up New York nights. The party was discussed cheerfully as a “small, intimate affair,” and the presence of Duchin, one of New York’s favorite society band leaders and a pianist of no small talent, could do nothing but enhance the effect.

Special Reception

Several guests opted to pay a higher ticket price and attend a special champagne reception in the hotel’s Tower Lounge. The first sight that greeted them was the trademarked little boy smile that repeatedly played on the lips of actor Elliott Gould, who along with actress Shelley Duvall served as Hollywood’s delegation to MEND. (Duvall, perhaps best known for her role as Olive Oyl in the movie musical “Popeye,” was recruited to the party by her good friend Kim Cranston, son of Democratic Sen. Alan Cranston of California.)

MEND founder and President Smith declared: “This is another milestone in MEND’s development. We’re reaching a different segment of San Diego tonight than we’ve reached before. A new group has tuned in to us.”

Smith acknowledged that her group is considered controversial in San Diego, which is regarded as a very conservative town. “Before I founded MEND, no one here knew or cared about my politics,” she said. “But when I proposed the Peace March in Balboa Park (held Aug. 6, 1985, the 40th anniversary of the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, with 10,000 participants), a lot of people said, ‘Whoa! Wait a minute!’ ”

“This certainly is the first ball given in San Diego for nuclear disarmament,” said MEND Executive Director Maureen King, who added that since many of the guests were not members of the organization, it was an opportunity to reach an entirely new audience. (One guest said that she came simply because MEND is considered controversial. “So many people acted strangely when I told them I planned to attend the ball that I had to come,” she said. “This is a free country, and this ball proves it.”)

King also said that she and Smith will fly to Washington for the Dec. 7 summit meeting between President Ronald Reagan and Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev; Smith hopes to speak to both men, having already met Gorbachev at the arms talks held in Geneva in 1985.

While peace, or at least a globe free of nuclear weapons, was on the minds of many, dinner was on the minds of all. Hotel executive chef Robert Brody created several special canapes for the evening, including venison carpaccio and walnut-Gorgonzola toasts. He followed these tidbits with a menu that included seafood pasta, roast lamb loin and plateau des fruits aux delices de Paris-Brest.

Theme Decorations

The decor made a greater-than-usual effort to emphasize the party’s theme. The centerpieces represented hollow globes, divided into quadrants by olive branches and planted with exotic blossoms representing different countries and cultures. As favors, both men and women took home cotton scarfs, designed by Washington scarf impresario Frankie Welch and printed with the gala’s globe-embracing logo.

Attorney and civic leader Jim Mulvaney offered the keynote speech and urged the crowd to wish Smith well on her trip to the nation’s capital.

In response, Smith told the crowd that MEND is “moderate, we’re centrist, we support a strong defense for the United States and affirm the integrity of our armed services. But we are alarmed by the world stockpile of nuclear weapons.”

This was an unusually serious moment for a San Diego fund-raiser, but it also was well-received and was followed by a lighter mood when Jack Berkman auctioned a specially inscribed serigraph of the Statue of Liberty donated by artist LeRoy Neiman. The artwork fetched nearly four times its initial offering price of $400.

The evening finished with Duchin and his band, which played the sort of cafe society tunes for which the pianist is famous, but surprised and delighted the crowd by suddenly switching into “Jailhouse Rock” and similar numbers.

Among the guests were Marco and Mary Lindenstein Walshok, Larry and Jeanne Lawrence, Jeanne Jones with San Francisco’s Clarence Woodard, Audrey Geisel, Charles and Sue Edwards, Luba Johnston, Susan Thompson, John and Judy Comito, Paul and Bernice Mahoney, Robert and Melesse Traylor, Tom and Nell Waltz, Jim and Mary Berglund, Ben and Nikki Clay, Joe and Annette Fritzenkotter, Tom and Jill Hall, Natalie Strombeck, Wes and Jenny Mudge, and David and Kay Rose.