TV ‘Addict’ Cuts Down Neighbor’s Oak Tree

A judge today sentenced a self-described television addict to two years on probation for chopping down a neighbor’s majestic oak tree to improve reception for his television satellite dish.

The judge didn’t address tree owner Charles Marriner’s request that Arthur Anderson’s satellite dish be taken away from him during the probationary period. “He’s going to be able to enjoy the fruits of his crime,” Marriner said.