Buffets often contain surprises. But you generally...

Buffets often contain surprises. But you generally don’t find a skydiver in one.

Such was the case, however, at the Fourth of July show at Pierce College when a parachutist attempted to land on the stadium field. Instead, he plopped down on a nearby salad table set up for VIPs by a hotel chain.

Talk about odd combinations--crashing into the Russian dressing on the Fourth of July.

No one was injured in the mishap, fortunately.

And lest you’re worried about the VIPs, a spokeswoman for the Woodland Hills Chamber of Commerce said that most of the execs already had filled their tummies by the time the skydiver became part of the spread.

Lena Bare of Van Nuys says she’s gotten a hoot out of one item appearing regularly of late in The Times’ death notices/funeral announcements section.

It reads: “Died: The American Flag, in Washington, D.C., on June 21, 1989, of Arson; by 5 old men.”

As for other things as American as the flag, the Fourth of July and Russian dressing, City Council aide Tom La Bonge just returned from L.A.’s sister city of Berlin (West) where he noticed that baseball is gaining popularity among the local kids.

“I saw one game of hardball in a park where several of the players were wearing Dodger hats,” said La Bonge, who works for Council President John Ferraro. “The only things they could say in English were ‘Kirk Gibson’ and ‘Orel Hersheiser.’ ”

Apparently, it’s difficult for some of the Berlin Dodgers to shed the old soccer reflexes, though. La Bonge observed that several times when the ball was thrown to the pitcher on one team, he elected to knock down the ball, not with his glove, but with his foot.

Look out “E.T.,” “Snow White” and “Ghostbusters”:

Later this summer, when cable stations begin televising Los Angeles City Council meetings--starring Ferraro, 14 council members and a cast of thousands of developers, lobbyists, bureaucrats and irate citizens--tapes of each session will go on sale for about $25.

On second thought, maybe E.T. won’t be so bad the 10th time around.

Maybe the car didn’t have air conditioning:

Bill Keene of KNX radio received one report Wednesday of “indecent exposure” on the Ventura Freeway.

A local journalist dialed a phone number that had been left on her answering machine by an unfamiliar name. She was told she had reached a secretary who was updating the Rolodex file of a Warner Brothers executive.

“Oh, I remember him (the executive) from when I was a literary agent,” the journalist said.

“Are you still doing that?” the executive’s secretary asked.

“No, I’m a journalist now.”

“Oh,” the secretary said, “what’s your name again so I can throw your card away?”