“The Haunts of Hollywood” is the title...

“The Haunts of Hollywood” is the title of a bus tour that will attempt to ferret out celebrity ghosts next Saturday in a sort of pre-Halloween rite.

Led by lecturer Richard Senate, who lists his occupation as “hauntings authority,” the passengers will tour sites in Tinseltown and environs, confronting such questions as:

* Can the specters of actor Clifton Webb and actress Virginia Rapp be seen romping about within the walls of the Hollywood Memorial Cemetery?

* Who is the faceless White Lady reported wandering through Farmers Market late at night?

* Did actor Montgomery Clift leave a psychometric impression at his old digs, the Roosevelt Hotel? A psychometric impression, in case you’ve forgotten, is an aura of emotional stress that exits a body and attaches itself to the physical surroundings.

The all-day seminar, sponsored by Learning Tree University, will, uh, kick off at 9 a.m. at the extension school’s campus in always-scary Thousand Oaks.

Price of the tickets is 65 bucks apiece, which is pretty chilling itself. But passengers will be supplied with metal rods for “dowsing sites to scare up ghosts.”

The approach of Halloween is a good time to remember that Hollywood is still haunted by famous unsolved crimes and deaths.

No doubt the spirit of director William Desmond Taylor is still hovering near 4th and Alvarado, waiting for police to resume the investigation of who shot him to death in his fashionable apartment. An actress and her mother were prime suspects in the 1922 crime but were never tried.

Maybe Taylor also left a psychometric impression on the old volumes of Fowler Brothers Bookstore--now on 7th Street--which was said to have been his last stop before going home. (He bought two copies of “Inhibitions, Symptoms and Anxiety” by Sigmund Freud.)

A metal rod waved about Pacific Coast Highway might be able to divine the restless presence of actress Thelma Todd, whose body was found in her car in Pacific Palisades in 1935. Cause of death was listed as carbon-monoxide poisoning but many in Hollywood suspected murder, at the hands of either a director or the Mafia.

And does Elizabeth Short’s spirit linger in the lobby of the downtown Biltmore Hotel, where she was reportedly seen making phone calls a few days before her murder in 1947?

She’s more often remembered, of course, by her nickname. Some acquaintances at a Long Beach drugstore told reporters that she was given to wearing black. So the press called her the Black Dahlia.

Now, on to haunted cars. . . .

Jinxed motorists Zsa Zsa Gabor and Jose Canseco will have their ritzy jalopies on the auction block in Woodland Hills today, hoping to put their problems with the law behind them.

Gabor is selling two Rolls-Royces, including the cream-colored Corniche that she was steering the night she landed a right-hand slap on a Beverly Hills cop.

Canseco, the Oakland A’s star who is also a right-handed hitter, is peddling the heavily customized red Jaguar that attracted several motorcycle cops.

The jaguar did, however, enable Canseco to enter baseball’s unique “120-120 Club” as the only player ever to drive in more than 120 runs and get ticketed for going more than 120 m.p.h.