Zsa Zsa and the Law, Part II:Playing...

Zsa Zsa and the Law, Part II:

Playing a new role--in a new city--Gabor visited the Santa Monica police station to report that her 2-year-old Shih Tzu dog had disappeared from her car while she and her husband, Prince Fred, were dining in a local restaurant.

Suddenly, a woman called from another eatery and reported that the black-and-white dog, named Genghis Kahn, had been found wandering nearby.

Zsa Zsa, aka the Beverly Hills Cop-Slapper, complimented the Santa Monica officer who helped, Linda Clark, as “a lovely, nice woman officer, dahling.”

A nice slap on the back.

It’s back to the future in Baldwin Park, which celebrated its centennial three years ago. Now the San Gabriel Valley city is celebrating its 34th anniversary, explaining that it wasn’t incorporated until 1957. When it comes to age, Baldwin Park is kind of the Zsa Zsa Gabor of cities.

Jim, the whacked-out cabbie on the old “Taxi” TV series, could not drive a hack in L.A. under a sweeping set of regulations approved by the City Council on Tuesday.

The ordinance, when signed by Mayor Tom Bradley, would require cabbies to adhere to a dress code that discourages the wearing of tank tops, open-toed sandals and cut-off shorts, and encourages the wearing of clean shirts.

“The hope is that they’re going to start disciplining themselves a little better,” said Bill Bicker, Bradley’s spokesman. “Under the old way, everyone was a little bit of a ‘Lone Ranger.’ ”

As Bicker’s remarks would indicate, the dress code also prohibits masks.

Drivers would be required to attend courses in such subjects as “Communications Skills,” “Passenger Relations,” and “What It Means When Someone’s Standing on a Curb and Waving Their Hand at Passing Autos.”

The hacks will face fines for breaches of etiquette. They’ll even have to provide passengers with “courtesy cards” that ask, in effect:

“How Am I Hacking?”

First Interstate World Center refuses to take down its “I” logos from their 73rd-story perch, despite a plea from the Downtown News to allow the building’s unblemished crown to become a proud symbol of L.A.

But here’s some good news: Wells Fargo’s “GO” logo is gone.

The mysterious message on the east face of its downtown digs didn’t really mean anything. The nine-foot-tall letters were temporarily tacked on the east face of the building for what a spokesman called an “aesthetic test.” The company has junked its old stagecoach symbol.

Now, for the not-so-good news: In six months, the building will further clutter the skyline with the name “WELLS FARGO.” No mystery about what those letters mean.

While promoters talk of a $33-million West Coast Gateway for L.A.--you haven’t forgotten “Steel Cloud” already, have you?--one beach city quietly came up with $2,000 for its own outdoor greeting.

In a variation on the old Burma Shave sign series, artist Michael Davis designed three plywood placards along Manhattan Beach Boulevard: One symbolizing a MAN, one symbolizing a HAT, and one that sort of stumped him.

The multilingual nature of L.A. has imposed new demands on the skills of panhandlers.

The other day, a young man zeroed in on a passer-by on Spring Street. But before making his pitch, he asked: “Do you speak English?”