SOCCER / PAUL McLEOD : AYSO’s Goal: Block Parents’ Shots at Players, Officials
At halftime of a recent youth soccer tournament at Columbia Park in Torrance, a 9-year-old girl stood motionless on the field before her father.
“Nobody blew it but you. Nobody blew it but you,” he said to the player, pushing his face into hers. “You blew it. Do you understand?”
The father, a spectator, was upset that she had allowed an opponent to score a goal against her team from Hawthorne.
Such actions by spectators have not gone unnoticed by American Youth Soccer Organization officials, who say violence, confrontation and overt criticism of young players, coaches and officials are on the rise.
AYSO officials are afraid that too many outbursts will turn kids off to playing. In fact, it has happened already, according to Torrance/Gardena Region 16 Commissioner Mike Daley, who admonished parental attitudes in a recent newsletter.
Daley wrote: “This year there has been too much negative criticism from the sidelines. . . . Apparently because of one parent’s outburst at a recent game a child even quit the program out of embarrassment.”
The AYSO was founded in Torrance in 1964 on the premise of “everyone plays, balanced teams, open registration and positive coaching.” Founder Hans Serle also built into the organization’s charter a warning that anyone will be disciplined for negative, rude or derogatory comments toward players, coaches or referees.
The idea was to grab a foothold in America by promoting a positive learning atmosphere, something that Serle contended is lacking in youth baseball programs.
“Under no circumstances should (a parent or spectator) attempt to coach or address remarks derogatory to the player or referees,” AYSO founders wrote.
In recent years, however, AYSO has struggled to keep parents in line with its philosophy.
“Some parents are merciless on their children,” Daley said. “It’s so sad to witness.”
The AYSO’s concern is increased with the recent start of the highly competitive tournament season, which continues through July.
“Tournament teams are the most competitive, so that is when you have problems,” Daley said. “When you get parents who are willing to pay extra money to (have their child play on) a tournament team, they think they have the right to (say what they want).”
What worries a lot of youth soccer officials is that this season got off to an unusually raucous start.
Said Joe Eldridge, national director of officiating, in the winter edition of Soccer Now Magazine: “Improving sportsmanship at every level is one of AYSO’s top priorities.”
Part of the problem, AYSO officials say, is that many parents don’t know the rules of the sport.
For example, a referee issued a yellow card (caution) to a Kindergarten-age coach earlier this year in an AYSO game when a defiant parent would not move from behind the goal. After the game the parent was combative and confronted a region coordinator “to report” the referee. He was unaware that AYSO rules state that the coach can be disciplined for the actions of his team’s spectators.
AYSO officials say most parents often forget that all referees, coaches and board members in the organization are volunteers. If a parent has a complaint with the officiating or coaching, the standard AYSO line is to encourage that parent to volunteer his own time as a coach or referee.
Soccer is the third-largest youth participation sport in this country, yet, as Daley suggests, a “kill the ump” mentality threatens its growth.
“It has taken parents this long to catch up with soccer,” Daley said. “With baseball, they are always on the refs and put pressure on children because they understand the sport. Five years ago, parents didn’t understand soccer well enough to know what an official’s call meant. Now they think they do.”
Cal State Dominguez Hills soccer Coach Marine Cano, a former professional goalie who was a player in the first AYSO league, said parents who have children in soccer need to “do their homework (and learn the game) rather than see how loud they can be on the sidelines.”
During a Thanksgiving holiday tournament in Cerritos, numerous red cards (ejections) were issued to coaches and players alike. The week before in Huntington Beach, a semifinal contest of an AYSO high school-age boys championship broke into a melee. Police were called. Two people were reportedly hospitalized.
Suggests Cheri Atkinson, a licensed clinical social worker and youth soccer coach who witnessed the fight in Huntington Beach: “A lot of people live through their kids. They project themselves onto the field. Also, there is that attitude of being better than the next guy.
“They look at kids sports, not as sports for kids, but as college or professional sports, where there is a win-at-all-costs mentality.”
Hence, a defensive mistake that allows a goal in the low-scoring game of soccer is seen as an affront.
Cano said he has noticed a marked increase in the negative attitude of parents at soccer games.
“It’s very disturbing to find at the youth level that parents are yelling at players. . . (If we have enough of that) we aren’t going to have any kids playing this game,” he said. “My advice to parents is to sit back and enjoy the game.”
As for the young player who was chewed out by her father? She never flinched. It appeared she had heard this kind of thing before.
