He Cookes Up List by Taking In, Letting Out

The “ins” include Vice President Dan Quayle and his wife Marilyn, columnists George Will and Carl Rowan, CBS White House correspondent Lesley Stahl, playwright Larry L. King, Office of Management and Budget Director Dick Darman and former Sens. Eugene McCarthy, George McGovern and Edmund Muskie.

The “outs” include Washington Mayor Marion Barry, Virginia Senator John Warner, any member of President George Bush’s family and any ex-wife of Washington Redskin owner Jack Kent Cooke.

The ins and outs of who sits in Cooke’s box at Redskin games were chronicled recently by Washington Post reporter Roxanne Roberts, who listed the guests’ principal activities as “(a) watching the game, (b) waving to friends and (c) pretending to look nonchalant.”

Add Cooke box: Along with detailed accounts of how Cooke assigns seating and his fourth wife’s designer fashion choices, Roberts reported the return to favor of Bill Regardie, publisher of Regardie’s, a Washington-based business magazine.

Regardie was banished from the box in 1989 after the paper published a Pat Oliphant cartoon satirizing Cooke.

Roberts wrote: “Episode 6 of ‘Oliphant’s Washington’ featured a character dubbed Jack Cant Cook, along with a court jester and a lineup of fawning celebrities. Oliphant threw in ’12 Ways to Jack Cant Cook’s Heart (or How to Get Jack’s Attention, Make His List and Be a Social Success in the Kingdom) which included tips such as, ‘Slap him on the back and yell, “How’s the wife?” and, ‘Shake his hand instead of kissing it.’ ”

Trivia time: Who was named AFC offensive player of the week three times during the 1990 NFL regular season?

Nice place to visit: After what happened to Dee Brown in Wellesley, Mass., last summer, you could understand if he never again set foot in the place.

The Boston Celtics’ rookie guard, who was mistaken for a bank robbery suspect by Wellesley police, was forced at gunpoint, along with his girlfriend, Jill Edmondson, to lie on the ground next to his car. The police later apologized.

Did Brown harbor ill feelings toward the town?

Apparently not. Saturday, he and Edmondson were married in nearby Wellesley Hills and announced that they are looking for a home in Wellesley.

Irish, they’re not: In Wednesday’s Morning Briefing item about Pro Beach Volleyball’s Steve Obradovich, his name was misspelled O’Bradovich .

Apologies to Obradovich and his brother Jim, former USC tight end who played with the New York Giants (1975), San Francisco 49ers (1976-77) and Tampa Bay (1978-83) . . . not to be confused with Ed O’Bradovich, the former Illinois defensive end who played with the Chicago Bears (1961-72).

Add Obradovich: The correct spelling of his name is especially important now that he has carved a niche for himself on the volleyball circuit.

Said Obradovich: “I finally met one of my heroes the other night and had my picture taken with him at the Forum. For a long time now, they’ve been calling me ‘the John McEnroe of Pro Beach Volleyball.’ ”

Trivia answer: Houston Oiler quarterback Warren Moon.

Quotebook: Detroit Tiger pitcher Dan Petry, on the team’s decision to outlaw smokeless tobacco in the clubhouse: “Next, it’ll be sugarless gum, then they’ll only allow chicken and fish in the postgame spread.”