COLUMN ONE : Bad Blood Flows for Neighbors : Crowding in Southern California is making people more territorial. Many rush to sue despite better alternatives.

Things are getting nasty between Southern California neighbors. Fewer disputes end with a handshake across the fence; more end up in court.

There are already some celebrated cases. Madonna was dragged into court by an angry neighbor who insisted that she clip her hedges, and a judge ordered her to do it.

Rock star Axl Rose was accused of blasting his stereo and clubbing a neighbor with a wine bottle. Rose accused his fellow condo owner of being a groupie pest. Both neighbors won temporary restraining orders and agreed to avoid each other.

Then there are the quarrels, certainly no less fierce, in the neighborhoods populated by the rest of us.

In Irvine last year, a constantly barking dog sparked a dispute that peaked when a fed-up neighbor sneaked out and shot it dead.

In Long Beach, a long-running argument over a loud stereo ended last May with two neighbors dead and two brothers arrested on suspicion of murder.

A Costa Mesa feud between the Gamboni and Dolan families over a disputed back-yard right of way ended up in court with a judge describing them as the urban equivalent of the Hatfields and McCoys.

People responsible for refereeing such disputes have witnessed a booming business. The Los Angeles County Dispute Resolution Services program, a nonprofit arm of the Los Angeles County Bar Assn., handled more than 6,000 cases representing all types of disputes between June, 1989, and June, 1990. The center handles court referrals and walk-in clients.

“It used to be that tenant-landlord disputes dominated, with neighbor-neighbor quarrels making up about 10% of our caseload,” said executive director Lauren Burton. “Now, they run from 20% to 30%.”

Litigation-happy Southern Californians, however, are finding courts among the least satisfactory routes for resolving disputes. The legal system, because of its adversarial nature, tends to make opposing parties even more angry at each other, experts say. Even if disputes are resolved, the two sides are no friendlier for the experience.

“It is unfortunate that the courts cannot resolve all the problems resulting from living in a modern, urban environment,” wrote Orange County Superior Court Judge William F. McDonald, in an opinion that pleased neither the Gambonis nor the Dolans. “The courts cannot make the (two families) stop hating each other. . . . Somehow these people are going to have to learn to at least (peacefully) exist on adjoining properties.”

While there are other places that sparring parties can go to resolve disputes, many refuse to pursue them. The Gambonis and Dolans, for example, were never able to sit down across a table from each other, even after the Orange County Human Relations Commission suggested that they mediate their squabble.

Chester Gamboni says he has had to mortgage his home to pay for legal fees. He lost a court ruling to Pat Dolan and is mulling an appeal.

“I had no idea this would come so far and cause so much damage to all of us,” Gamboni said. “But I think we’re both unwilling to back off now. I know I am.”

The bickering between the two families began with disagreement over an easement, but over the years the dispute became a name-calling, racially tinged brawl. The Dolans accused the Gambonis of “constant harassment, almost daily surveillance and regular hang-up calls,” according to court declarations. The Gambonis in turn accused the Dolans of injuring their dog, poisoning their trees and harassing the family out of prejudice against Latinos.

Social scientists say reasons for the rising number and intensity of disputes vary and include dismantling of once-solid neighborhood ties, ethnic conflicts, more tightly packed neighborhoods and less privacy.

“As we become more of a megatropolis, we lose the sense of . . . identity with our neighbors, a sense of ethnic (identity) and even the sense of many years together in a neighborhood that make problems easier to resolve,” said Peter Robinson, associate director of the Institute for Dispute Resolution at Pepperdine University.

Added Burton of the County Bar’s dispute resolution service: “In urban communities the whole structure is set up for conflict where you have large apartment units and cheap construction that is not designed to give complete privacy. Plus you have very different lifestyles and cultures coming together in one space.”

Indeed, many experts say shrinking boundaries have led to aggressive territoriality that makes friendly relations ever more difficult; in many ways we’ve begun acting like cornered animals.

Population numbers are telling: According to U.S. Census estimates, from 1980 to 1989, the population in Riverside County increased by 53%; in San Diego County by 30%; in Los Angeles County by 16% and in Orange County by 18%. Population density figures are even more striking.

In Thousand Oaks, density increased a whopping 3,458%, from 60 to 2,148 people per square mile, between 1960 and 1989. Density increased in Huntington Beach from 442 to 7,258 per square mile over the same 30-year period.

“The more people you crowd into a box, the madder at each other they become. Most aggressive behavior in the animal kingdom is due to close proximity,” said UC Irvine psychiatrist Raymond W. Novaco, who specializes in the study of anger, aggressive behavior and human stress.

Some cultures have learned to adapt to living on top of each other; Americans apparently have not.

“In a culture like Hong Kong, where people are more used to living in crowded conditions, the opinion is there’s something wrong with you if you can’t get along with your neighbor,” said Thomas Pritchard, a licensed family therapist and director of the Mediation Center, a private association of family mediators in Orange.

“In America there is a frontier mentality of wide-open spaces. . . . We’re not used to these packed-in conditions and it tends to produce less tolerance.”

Even in the famous feud between the Hatfields and McCoys, some historians say, something very much like urban stress may have been a contributing factor.

The two families in western Kentucky reportedly had gone to court in 1860 over a disputed hog, but animosity intensified as the devoutly Confederate rebel Anderson Hatfield and the fiercely Union Randall McCoy became foes during the Civil War. The imbroglio claimed 20 lives over more than 30 years.

According to some Hatfield-McCoy experts, the Appalachian region underwent a social upheaval just after the Civil War, when Eastern speculators attracted by the area’s mineral riches descended in large numbers. People had become inured to violence, were resentful of newcomers and changing economic relationships and felt threatened by even longtime neighbors, said Loyal Jones, director of the Appalachian Center at Berea College in Kentucky.

“There was a breaking up of neighborhoods and families (were) pitted against each other,” said Jones. “Mountain people tended to be very proud and it was hard to overlook a slight or injury. If one did damage to another family, there was a feeling that it had to be avenged.”

Today’s feuds are less bloody, but no less virulent:

* The feud between the Rubins and the Schilds, neighboring Encino families, has raged for more than a year, leading to lawsuits, countersuits and restraining orders, all over the noise produced by a bouncing basketball. Kenneth Schild and his son like to shoot a few hoops on their back-yard court. Michael Rubin and his wife Yifat claim the noise disturbs their peace. Schild accuses Rubin of repeatedly spraying his son with a water hose. He sued the Rubins in order, he says, to protect the right of his children to play safely in their own back yard. Meanwhile, Rubin filed a $2-million suit against the Schilds, claiming injury to his “health, strength and activity.” The lawsuits between the men, both attorneys, are pending.

* In the bucolic San Gabriel Valley community of Hacienda Place, a historic 100-year-old pecan tree has led to a free-for-all between the neighboring Garcia and Stoner families. Robert Garcia claims that the tree, on the property of Martin and Darleen Stoner, litters his immaculately kept yard and driveway with thousands of unsightly nuts.

When the Stoners refused to promise to pick up the pecan tree droppings, Garcia hired a tree trimming service to cut back the branches. The furious Stoners sued Garcia, claiming, among other things, that he harassed them by installing bright outdoor lights to shine in their bedroom window. Garcia countersued, accusing the Stoners of denying him the enjoyment of his property. Both accused each other of indiscriminate water squirting.

In November, a Pomona Municipal Court jury convicted Garcia of battery for spitting at Stoner over a fence, disturbing the peace with a radio and violating an order to refrain from squirting water on Stoner and his car. Garcia was fined $470, placed on two years probation and ordered to spend 10 days working at a tree farm. He is appealing.

* One West Hollywood man has taken on a group of six neighbors whom he blames for the city’s decision to deny a remodeling plan for his home. After angry words were exchanged, neighbors said the man began staring at them and several finally called the Sheriff’s Department to intervene.

“What we can do is listen to the problem but we’re not going to solve the problem. Our role is to help them see the other person’s point of view,” said Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Deputy Randy Lawrence, who investigated the complaints.

Another option increasingly used by law enforcement is to refer battling neighbors to dispute resolution centers, which offer mediation without the cost and frustration of a court fight.

Long established in many Bay Area communities, the concept of neighborhood resolution centers was given a boost statewide in 1986 with the passage of legislation allowing counties to increase court filing fees to fund such nonprofit programs.

Programs have been developed in 18 counties in the state, including Los Angeles, San Diego and San Bernardino. Orange County, which includes one of the most litigious populations in the state, according to the California Judicial Council, is one of only four large counties without such a program. The others are Kern, Riverside and Santa Clara.

More than 7,000 disputes were handled through centers in the 18 counties during one six-month period in 1989, according to a recently conducted survey by the state Department of Consumer Affairs. Researchers estimated that more than 5,000 of the cases would have ended up in court if it weren’t for the programs. About 63% of the disputes were settled successfully through mediation, conciliation or arbitration.

Los Angles County officials estimate that their program saved taxpayers nearly $1.7 million in court costs in 1988.

Mediation is the most popular form of resolution because parties sit down with each other, figure out common objectives and reach their own agreement with the assistance of a third person. A goal of the process is mending the relationship or at least ensuring a peaceful co-existence.

Conciliation is like shuttle diplomacy: a third party contacts the disputants separately to facilitate an agreement. An arbitration proceeding is more akin to a judicial hearing in that the parties agree to allow a neutral person to render a decision that becomes binding.

One obstacle is making the existence and relative low cost of mediation known to the general public, said experts.

But they acknowledge that the bigger hurdle may lie in changing the nature of how we react to each other.

“There are some people who just want to hurt each other no matter what the costs,” said Orange County attorney and mediator Roger Lehman.

However, many experts say resolution centers, which provide services free of charge or based on ability to pay, hold the promise of becoming like community tribunals common in Asia and elsewhere, with volunteer mediators helping neighbors resolve all kinds of squabbles.

The Jewish and Muslim religions have traditional court systems that adjudicate business and personal matters, usually through arbitration.

The Jewish court, or bet din, dates to the time of Moses, and Jewish law specifically requires Jews to submit their disputes to such panels. Although almost all American Jews take their complaints to a civil court, the ancient legal system is enjoying a resurgence among Southern California’s Orthodox Jewish community.

There are mediation services in the Los Angeles area that cater to African-American, Asian, Jewish and Christian communities. Experts say such services are proliferating not simply to ease the workload of the courts but in recognition that accessible, efficient, effective forums are a must in an increasingly complex society.

Albert Balingit, coordinator of the state Department of Consumer Affairs’ dispute resolution office, said he has seen even the most vengeful of neighbors resolve their differences through mediation.

For example, the Drinkwards and Potters of Redondo Beach had not spoken to each other for 15 years because of admittedly “dumb stuff” like errant leaves and puddles of water on the wrong side of the driveway. More recently the Potters had threatened to sue over the damage caused to their driveway from the Drinkwards’ dozen large juniper trees.

A third party suggested that the couples try a mediator. It took only three hours for years of bad feeling to be diffused, said Jim Drinkward. During the holidays, the couple exchanged Christmas cards.

AVOIDING LITIGATION DISPUTES

People involved in disputes who wish to avoid litigation have a number of options:

* Mediation: Face-to-face, across-the-table communication facilitated by a neutral person.

* Arbitration: A hearing at which disputants may offer evidence and witnesses. The disputants agree to abide by decision reached by a neutral person.

* Conciliation: A process of independent communication between the disputants and a neutral person.

Los Angeles County offers a number of community programs, including:

* L.A County Bar Assn. Dispute Resolution Services, 213-627-2727.

* Asian Pacific American Dispute Resolution Center, 213-748-2022.

* Martin Luther King Legacy Assn., 213-295-8582.

San Diego County residents may contact the Community Mediation Program of San Diego at 619-238-1022.

Ventura County residents may contact the Ventura Center for Dispute Settlement at 805-650-9202.

For more information about dispute resolution programs throughout the state contact the California Department of Consumer Affairs, Dispute Resolution Office, at 916-322-5254.