It’s Freeway Close, So Hurry: Seller’s Motivated
Spring is in the air and the combination of low interest rates and the perceived bottoming out of the real estate market have combined to seduce many people into looking for a home or condo.
As they comb the real estate section and advertisements that appear in the newspaper every Saturday and Sunday, readers see adjectives like “luxurious,” “spacious,” “priced right,” often followed by a family of exclamation points and the warning to “hurry.”
From experience, we know what they say is definitely not what they mean.
This Guide to Commonly Used Real Estate Terms is therefore presented as a public service to those who are about to begin looking for a home or condo. Although some of the terms refer specifically to the Westside of Los Angeles, you will immediately recognize their counterparts in your own neighborhood.
Close to transportation--Either straddling a major bus line or in the shade of a freeway.
Luxury--Has electricity and running water.
All amenities--Electricity, running water and windows.
Condominium association management committee--A group composed of people that you might nod to in the hallway, whose tastes and values are radically different from yours and whose ability to set association fees determines your monthly discretionary income.
Condominium association fee--Money you flush down the toilet every month.
“Golden Triangle”--An area bordered by three streets in which higher prices are charged. See Marina del Rey.
“Silver Triangle”--Within three miles in any direction of a “Golden Triangle.” See “Marina del Rey.”
Adjacent--You can get there by bus without transferring.
Marina del Rey--An area of very flexible boundaries with a great Golden Triangle, a nice Silver Triangle and which is Venice adjacent.
Beverly Hills adjacent--The western half of Los Angeles County.
Starter home--You’d hate to think it will be your ending home. See Doll House.
Easy to show--Probably the worst reason in the world to buy a home.
Near the airport--Probably the second worst reason to buy a home
Great potential--See “Needs some work.”
Pride of ownership--Often not much better than the shame of renting.
Recently remodeled--An older place with a fresh coat of white paint, recently installed cheap carpet and maybe some new blinds.
Won’t last--Already lasted too long.
Seller motivated--What happens after a property “won’t last.”
Must see, bring offers or hurry--The listing broker is even more motivated than the seller.
Doll house--Wonderful, if you’re the size of a doll.
Needs some work--The work should be done by a bulldozer.
Curb appeal--Usually an accurate description, but most people prefer to live in the house, whose appeal rarely matches that of the curb.
Needs TLC--In this case, “TLC” means “Time, Labor and Cash.”
Near shopping--Customers of the shopping center down the street will use all available street parking.
Perfect for a couple--The small second bedroom could be converted into a nice walk-in closet.
A good investment--A nondescript house, but if you stay there long enough, someone will eventually want to knock it down and put up an apartment building.
Any development with “snow,” “river,” “creek” or “brook” in the title--An hour’s drive from the nearest natural source of water.
Home ownership--An empty bank account.
Town house status symbol--A BMW or Mercedes parked in the driveway.
Family home status symbol--A 4-wheel-drive vehicle or van parked in the driveway.
Ultimate status symbol--A dumpster parked in the driveway.
