Padres Deserve to Feel Punchy : Baseball: From Roberts’ pain to Santiago’s aim, it was a crazy season.

There were no return visits to the microphone by Roseanne Barr. Jack Clark wasn’t calling anyone a snake, at least inside the Padre clubhouse. There wasn’t even a managerial firing.

But the Padres still found a way into the spotlight. It might have been a quiet year by Padre standards, but the team still had its share of crazy incidents.

Sit back and remember:

Injury of the Year: While the Padres used the disabled list 15 times and set a franchise record by using 48 players, Bip Roberts stole the show. Roberts missed a month with torn knee cartilage, nine games with back spasms and six games with a bruised shoulder . . . and that wasn’t all.

Sitting down to eat a plate of hot chicken, he bit hard on his fork and broke his front tooth in half.

For Roberts, it was even worse than missing a game after eating a plate of bad shrimp in Cincinnati.

Knockout Punch: Benito Santiago, enraged after a strikeout, flung his batting helmet into the dugout. It bounced off the floor, caromed off the wall and struck Padre Manager Greg Riddoch in the head.

It knocked him woozy, and Riddoch spent the rest of the game on the trainers’ table.

Anyone for a Bath? Shortstop Garry Templeton, who was traded away in late May, made headlines by being discovered as the biggest water-user in San Diego County.

He somehow was using 10,000 gallons a day.

Leave the Shin Guards Behind: Riddoch, after fouling up a double switch in Montreal, wound up using Santiago in left field. Riddoch said it was no problem, considering Santiago had played the position in the minors.

Santiago later admitted he he hadn’t played the outfield since he was 11 or 12 years old.

Excuse Me, Anyone Sitting Here? Reliever Mike Maddux, hanging out in Las Vegas, attended a baseball banquet one day in February. Joe McIlvaine, Padre general manager, was there. Maddux sauntered over, introduced himself and asked if the Padres had an opening in their minor-league camp.

In the final week of spring training, Maddux finally made it to the big-league camp, and he spent the next six months as the Padres’ most consistent pitcher.

Quote of the Year: Shortstop Tony Fernandez got in a heated argument with tranquil first base coach Rob Picciolo before a game, and reporters scrambled to find each side’s version.

Picciolo simply refused comment, and told reporters he wouldn’t talk about it.

When Fernandez was told of Picciolo’s no comment-stance, he yelled: “He’s lying.”

Who’s on First? The Padres had no idea they were scheduled to play a split-squad game in spring training against the San Francisco Giants, although the contest was on everyone else’s Cactus League schedule but the Padres’.

The Padres learned of the game two days before they were scheduled to leave town.

Cover-Up of the Year: Riddoch, asked to explain why Tony Gwynn left a game early, he said it was to rest him. Gwynn was nowhere to be found after the game, and it assumed he simply left early.

Gwynn revealed the next day that he was in the hospital for X-rays for possible broken ribs.

Call-Up of the Year: The Padres, realizing they needed more pitching help, called up reliever Steve Rosenberg of Las Vegas the night of April 11, only a few days after he had been sent to the Stars.

Rosenberg arrived the following day, eager to pitch in his first National League game, when a call arrived in the bullpen. Rosenberg was ineligible to pitch. He had not stayed in the minors for the mandatory 10 days.

Rosenberg packed his bags, and headed back to Las Vegas that afternoon, too embarrassed to say good-by.