THE WIDENING WORLD OF DISNEY : Mickey Goes to France : An Adult and a Child Sample the New Euro Disney Outside Paris : Totally Awesome for Kids

So, how do you get your parents to take you to Euro Disneyland, Disney’s newest theme park near Paris, France? Simple. Beg. Please, please, please.

Better yet, beg in French. Here’s what to say: S’il vous plait, S’il vous plait, S’il vous plait. Here’s how to say it: see voo play.

Doing such a thing will probably fool them into thinking you want to go for a cultural experience. Ha, ha, ha. But promise them anything they want to hear.

Like this:

* You will go to the Louvre Museum in Paris with them to see the Mona Lisa, a rather boring (but very famous) painting by Leonardo da Vinci (not the Ninja Turtle, the painter!).

* You will pose for family memory portraits outside Notre Dame (famous church with pigeon poop all over it) or the Arc de Triomphe (famous monument). Gets ‘em every time.

* You will be adventurous with all foods, such as escargots-- snails!

* You will not say, “Are we there yet?” even once during the long plane ride, and you will not blast music on your Game Boy.

Now you’ve got your family to Euro Disneyland, right? Good. You must stay at the Hotel Cheyenne. The people who work there wear jeans and bandannas and say “howdy” all the time. And the rooms have bunk beds! It’s cheap, too, so your parents will like that.

As for the park itself, it’s not as big as Disney World in Florida or Disneyland in Anaheim, but it’s big enough to have fun in. All the signs are in English, and there are plenty of hot dogs, hamburgers and French fries. Actually, the park is so American you feel like you’re in the States!

There is no question about it. You must go on Big Thunder Mountain, the scariest roller coaster ever. It’s soooo fun. I warn you, though, in order to keep your parents from taking you home early, don’t take them on this ride. (My mom lost her dinner! Gross.) And the line is always long, so be prepared to wait.

Some other great rides: Star Tours, an awesome trip into space. Phantom Manor, a haunted house that will scare you to death. Autopia, you really get behind the wheel.

Now, I have more or less guided you into fibbing to your Mom and Dad about wanting to go to France when all you really want to do is go to Euro Disneyland. But they might not like some of the food or some of the rides in Euro Disneyland, so make sure you fib humorously. And do go into Paris with them--at least once. Au Revoir and merci .