I was disturbed by the statement that "most of the time, stepfathers can't begin to fill the void."
My son, now 12, was 2 when his father and I divorced, and 5 when I remarried. My son's "real" father lives in England and does not pay child support. My husband foots the bill for food, clothing, health insurance, educational needs and summer camp without a second thought.
This stepfather is the man who has never missed a soccer game, an open house or a back-to-school night, events at which "real" fathers are often absent. He taught my son to ride a bike, ice skate and ski, helps him with his homework and ties his tie. My son's stepfather continues to teach him about growing up, about love and honor and responsibility.