A Recent Conversation With My Grandmother, By AMY UYEMATSU
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When I wake up in middream
or find myself humming
a melody with no sharps or flats,
I know I’ve been outside of this time.
If only I could speak with obachan,
not be groping inside this buried place
for the carelessly thrown out
language of immigrants,
only two generations
since leaving Shizuoka.
She knew I would go back to Izu peninsula,
climb the slopes of Omuro-yama
with my mother’s cousin,
the wind slapping my hair
hard against my face,
no sound from the ocean below
as the wind moans
through the long mountain grass.
*
I can’t say the words.
We gave up a language well suited to farmers
and poets, its rhythm uneven with
brush strokes and pause.
It holds sound inside picture
with a thousand possibilities for
shadow and light.
*
Instead I must use
these words with no memory.
From “30 Miles From J-Town” (Story Line Press: $11.95; 104 pp.). Amy Uyematsu is a third-generation Californian of Japanese ancestry: sansei. She lives in Los Angeles. 1992 by Amy Uyematsu. Reprinted by permission.