Name that state: Inspired by Assemblyman Stan...

Name that state: Inspired by Assemblyman Stan Statham’s proposal to slice California into thirds, the KCET public affairs program “Life & Times” asked viewers to propose names for the trio.

Winning entry in the “Altered States” contest came from Frans Baert of Sherman Oaks, who suggested, Id, Ego and Super Ego, for the southern, central and northern regions, respectively. (Yes, San Francisco would be a part of Ego.) Baert’s prize was a California state flag, which no doubt will be a great conversation piece someday.

Runner-up entries (reading from north to south) included:

* Heaven, Purgatory and Hell.

* Logland, Fogland and Smogland.

* And, our personal favorite, from Mickey Mullens of Rosamond: Larry, Curly and Moe. Then, again, which of those three would get the rights to the state slogan: “Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk”?

*

A good and smelly Samaritan: “My friend dropped her keys into the sewer at the corner of Pico and La Cienega and this stranger with no shoes and only shorts and a T-shirt came over,” reports Shannon Cooper of Eagle Rock.

“He lay on the ground and tried to reach down and grab them. Then he climbed down in there and started crawling around on his hands and knees, like a Ninja Turtle. He found the keys and I shook his hand. He told me his name was Glen and then he just rushed off into the sunset.”

In search of pizza?

*

Eliminate annoying leisure time now: Dick Watts of Rolling Hills Estates came across a gardener’s flyer apparently designed for the resident who doesn’t have enough yardwork (see excerpt).

*

Dueling automotive giants: Ron Kerns of Long Beach, meanwhile, noticed a sign for a Bellflower repair shop that seems to be rather selective in what in what it will service (see photo).

*

Name the wallet: If you were thinking of phoning Van Nuys police to claim that lost wallet containing $2,000, you’re too late. The real owner showed up, identified the billfold and produced receipts indicating why he was carrying that much money.

It had been turned in a few days earlier by a good Samaritan (this one was wearing shoes so it probably wasn’t Glen).

L.A. Police Sgt. James Bower said a few people phoned afterward and figured “they might get lucky. They thought if they asked, ‘Was it a brown wallet?’ we’d turn it right over to them.”

*

Material child: Comic Jay Leno, commenting on the rumor that a certain pop superstar is pregnant: “How would you like to have Madonna as your mom? You’d have to be 21 before you could look at the family photo album.”

*

Only in Wauwatosa: Wende Polsin of Silver Lake sent along a photocopy of a Burger King coupon she picked up at a Sav-On in Studio City. It says the 2-for-1 sandwich offer is “good only at: 6520 W. North Ave., Wauwatosa WI 53213.” That’s even farther away than Logland.

miscelLAny:

Frederick’s of Hollywood recently won the corporate competition in a walk for charity, after which event co-chairman Chevy Chase scrawled a mock warning on its award certificate. It said: “No crotchless running shorts next time.”