MANAGING YOUR MONEY / Earning More, Keeping More : PRENUPTIAL PACTS : <i> It’s better to be safe than sorry.</i>

After her fiance proposed, Edie popped a question of her own. The retired secretary asked to be loved, honored and cherished--but left alone with a $1-million divorce settlement from her previous marriage.

“I wanted to protect it (the money) for my children so they would inherit it,” said the 56-year-old San Francisco woman, who asked that her full name not be disclosed. “He wanted to do the same for his daughters. We approached this from a mature, practical point of view.”

Unromantic? Sure. But an increasing number of couples, especially those married before or with substantial assets, are opting for separate financial arrangements through what are known as prenuptial agreements.

These couples realize that marriage is just as much a business partnership as it is a spiritual one--and that it ends in divorce nearly half the time.

“I would say that they’re (prenuptial agreements) on the rise because of the damaging effects of divorce. Everyone has heard multiple horror stories from friends,” said Victoria Felton-Collins, a financial planner and psychologist who counsels couples on money matters.

A “prenup” agreement determines in advance how assets will be divided in the event of a divorce, separation or death of a spouse--much like a will--while detailing how a couple’s finances should be handled during the marriage.

The pact can cost anywhere from $1,000 to $25,000 for lawyers to draw up, although some basic do-it-yourself kits can be purchased from legal bookstores for less than $100.

The beauty of the pacts is that they can cover everything from the ownership of a family business to the upbringing of children.

“They’re custom-made. You can put anything in it that you want,” said Franklin S. Bonem, a family law attorney and partner with the New York firm Proskauer Rose Goetz & Mendelsohn.

In Edie’s case, she and her widowed second husband agreed to keep all assets from their previous marriages separate in order to pass them along to their children and grandchildren. All subsequent income and expenses would be combined.

“I think that from our vantage point, having been married for a long time, it was easier for us to do,” said Edie, whose first marriage ended in divorce after 28 years. “We didn’t want our children squabbling after one of us passes away.”

Bonem recommends prenuptials for individuals who are marrying someone with substantially less money or more debt, for individuals with children from a previous marriage to support, and for someone with a family enterprise to maintain.

“A lot of times it’s the family, not the betrothed, that’s pushing for a prenuptial in order to protect the family business,” Bonem said. Often it’s the prospective groom or his family that wants an agreement drawn up.

Bonem says his law firm has seen a steady increase in prenuptial business in recent years, both in agreements they’ve been asked to prepare and to review.

Premarital contracts, though, have been around in one form or another for ages.

The Babylonians used them to determine the dowry of a bride as early as the first millennium B.C. In the late 1500s, Queen Elizabeth I watched her wedding plans with a young French duke collapse after both sides failed to reach an amicable agreement. (He wanted to be crowned king right after the wedding.)

Premarital contracts were almost exclusively used by the rich until about a decade ago, when changes in divorce law began recognizing marriage as an economic partnership.

Depending on the terms, signing a prenup often means one spouse relinquishes legal rights to certain property he or she might otherwise be entitled to under state law.

That’s just one more reason why any prenuptial agreement you might think about signing should be prepared by an attorney--or at least reviewed by one--who has ample experience in prenup law as it’s practiced in your state.

In fact, legal experts say each individual who will sign the prenup should have the contract reviewed by a separate attorney and that the pact should be signed long before the wedding. For those planning a spring ceremony, or even an engagement during the upcoming holidays, now is probably the best time to get started, they say.