Decent exposure: Journal of the Senses, the...

Decent exposure: Journal of the Senses, the Elysium Institute’s publication, shows its followers standing by an “Adopt a Highway/Litter Removal” sign, which the group is sponsoring. The members of the nudist colony even made the supreme sacrifice of finding some clothes to wear while working. They no doubt figured that drivers on Topanga Canyon Boulevard are erratic enough.

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The first cookie opening: As we have often noted, L.A. has claimed its share of culinary inventions--the chili size (Ptomaine Tommy’s), the cheeseburger (short-order cook Lionel Sternberger), the Shirley Temple cocktail (Brown Derby), and the Moscow mule (Cock ‘n’ Bull), among others.

The Smithsonian magazine reminds us that L.A. should be credited with another.

“The fortune cookie is indisputably American,” writes Stanley Karnow in the January issue. “It was invented in 1916 by David Jung, a Los Angeles noodle manufacturer.” Karnow says Jung “borrowed the idea from the practice among ancient Chinese rebels of exchanging covert messages inside buns.”

One country that has long spurned the prophetic dessert, by the way, is China. But, Karnow adds, a state-owned company in Canton will soon be churning out fortune cookies. The factory is being built by a noodle company from that well-known suburb of Beijing, Brooklyn.

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Luckily, he has a thick skin: Even if it is an L.A. invention, Joe Roubal of Marina del Rey has lost faith in the sagacity of the fortune cookie. He sent along a message he found in a take-out order, adding that so far “no fruit or vegetable has shown me the slightest sign of respect.”

Bathing in luxury: Jerry Cowle of Pacific Palisades found an ad in a local paper for a mansion that seems to have recreational facilities for some of the hired help. But what about the chauffeur?

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Faulting the Southland: L.A. is one of the few cities that has a section to itself in the recently published “But I Wouldn’t Want to Live There! (Wicked Wisdom from Seasoned Travelers),” edited by Michael and Lisa Cader. Some excerpted taunts:

“Nothing is wrong with Southern California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn’t cure.”

--Mystery novelist Ross Macdonald

“It’s a shame to take this country away from the rattlesnakes.”

--Attributed to early-century film-maker D.W. Griffith, while shooting in the San Fernando Valley

“In Southern California the vegetables have no flavor and the flowers have no smell.”

--Author H.L. Mencken

Oddly enough, other books quote Mencken as having said that L.A. “stank of orange blossoms.” We wonder if his nose ever made up its mind about our fair city.

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But why should L.A. take this abuse alone?Let’s at least quote author Molly Ivins on what the license plates should say in the state that sent out a Rose Bowl winner Jan. 1:

“Wisconsin--Eat Cheese or Die.”

There, we feel a little better now.

miscelLAny:

Some roadways have turnouts that are observation spots. The Santa Monica Freeway, however, has the honor of becoming the first Southland thoroughfare to feature turnouts that are Accident Investigation Sites. The 12 screened-off sections allow drivers whose bumpers have met to exchange information (and insults, if necessary) in private.