They’re good role models even if they...

They’re good role models even if they do drool in public: As part of its anti-drug effort, the U.S. Customs Service hands out trading cards celebrating its Hall of Fame of K-9 interdictors. The cards list phone numbers on the back that advise citizens how to report “suspicious activities.” The hard-eyed hounds carry such menacing names as Marauder (Miami, Fla.), Champ (New Orleans), Desperado (Laredo, Tex.) and Sparky (Chicago).

All except the L.A. rep--Muffin.

Just to help this town dispel its Lotus Land reputation, we wish Customs could have selected a cur with a more imposing name. Oh well. At least, Muffin’s not a poodle.

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We’re really going to the dogs today: Congratulations to Friskie, Beatrice Berman’s 13-year-old dog, who recently celebrated his bark-mitzvah in Chatsworth.

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Urban Myth No. 5,212: It’s linked to the earthquake, of course--what isn’t these days? The Times has heard from several callers who claim there’s a conspiracy to hide the fact that the quake’s magnitude was really 8.0. One caller quoted an unnamed structural engineer who said that only an 8.0 temblor could have inflicted the damage of the Northridge quake. And why the conspiracy? The unfounded rumor that FEMA is obligated to give outright grants, rather than loans, to damaged houses and businesses after quakes of 8.0 or more.

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Cover-up: Adweek magazine reports that the Museum Square building on Wilshire Boulevard has unveiled “the latest way to cover up earthquake damage . . . with advertising. With a healthy chunk of one corner of the building noticeably missing, managers decided to cover it up (with) a large banner that reads, ‘Now leasing,’ directly over the damage.”

The building’s management said the placement was intentional, adding, “The damage is cosmetic, which is why we put a banner over it. . . . We were going to put a Band-Aid up, but it was taking too long. . . .”

Adweek’s comment: “Interesting strategy, but would it fly in a client meeting?”

Thanks, but hope we don’t see you again on TV for a while: Ken Wilkins of Northridge writes that Angelenos “didn’t look to the mayor, governor or the President for comfort and understanding” after the quake. No, they turned to the U.S. Geological Survey’s Lucy Jones and Caltech’s Kate Hutton, whom he salutes in verse:

With mikes in their faces the questions abound

But cautious are the answers on the shaking ground.

Their knowledge is great and their patience is long

As each shock is noted, just where and how strong.

So break our dishes and rattle our bones--

We still have Hutton and we still have Jones.

miscelLAny:

Newspaper stands selling real-estate advertisers are common. But we saw one in Westwood that advertised property a bit north of L.A. It was titled, “Oregon Rentals and Homes for Sale.”