Sports Fan Clinton Has Become Fair Game for ESPN

President Clinton watched Arkansas beat Michigan in Dallas last Sunday to advance to the Final Four, prompting ESPN’s Dan Patrick to say:

“Clinton was thrilled Arkansas wasn’t playing Wisconsin Whitewater.”

Add Clinton: While Arkansas was winning, CBS cameras showed Clinton in the seats, giving his home-state Razorbacks a big thumbs up.

“He’s got to be careful,” commentator Billy Packer said. “Michigan has more electoral votes than Arkansas.”

Trivia time: What was Barry Switzer’s record against USC while he was coaching at Oklahoma?

Skategate: Tennis player Brad Gilbert has an unusual opinion on the Nancy Kerrigan-Tonya Harding affair.

“Kerrigan ought to get down and kiss Harding’s feet,” Gilbert said in the April issue of Tennis magazine.

He said the attention created by the assault on Kerrigan threw the spotlight on both figure skaters.

Before that, Gilbert added, “These girls were going nowhere.”

Sideshow: National media representatives converged on the Dallas Cowboys’ headquarters on Monday, the day before Coach Jimmy Johnson resigned as a result of his dispute with owner Jerry Jones.

Reporters started arriving as early as 6 a.m.

“I saw guys with sleeping bags,” quarterback Troy Aikman said. “I thought Garth Brooks tickets were on sale.”

Boo hoo: Xavier McDaniel of the once proud but now struggling Boston Celtics summed up his team’s attitude to the Boston Globe:

“We still have some pride, but not a whole lot. When you are a lottery team, no one cares about you at all.”

We’re No. 3!Coach Jerry Sloan says his Utah Jazz are the happiest third-place team he has ever seen.

“We’re not able to execute. We’re not able to shoot. We’re not able to stop anybody,” he said. “But that must make us happy. We must be happy being in third place. Otherwise we’d be out here working--trying to get better.”

Low rise: Walt Zembriski, a golfer on the senior tour, is introduced as a former construction worker who used to work on skyscrapers.

While on the practice range with Zembriski for the Tradition tournament in Scottsdale, Ariz., Lee Trevino turned to some friends and said:

“We investigated and Zembriski never climbed anything higher than a 7-Eleven.”

Famous First: Gil Leberton of the Ft. Worth Star-Telegram on a quick equipment change during the NCAA Midwest Regional final: “Michigan’s Juwan Howard became the First Player to Ever Drop His Shorts in Front of a First Lady.”

Trivia answer: Switzer had an 0-3-1 record against USC.

Quotebook: Oakland Athletic Manager Tony La Russa on Jose Canseco’s story that he contemplated suicide: “My on-the-record comment is that Jose always did tell good stories.”