Parenting : Lessons of a Family Album : The Yellens chronicle their life together--the ups and downs--for a unique insider’s look at raising children.

Northridge psychologists Andrew and Heidi Yellen keep some interesting mementos in their office waiting room: scrapbooks of their family vacations, academic and sports awards won by their children, poetry written by their parents.

“My friends tease me that we’re the ‘Leave It to Beaver’ family,” jokes Josh, 20, the Yellens’ son.

“The fact is,” says daughter Erit, 16, “we are.”

If the scrapbooks aren’t enough to prove it, Andrew Yellen has just published a book called “The Art of Perfect Parenting and Other Absurd Ideas.” Subtitled “The first truly practical, hands-on approach to behavioral management,” it draws on the experiences of three generations of his family.

Folksy, humorous, full of practical advice, the book started off as a newsletter to friends and clients detailing the Yellens’ successes and failures as parents. Andrew and Heidi specialize in family therapy, and unlike many psychologists, they are very open with their clients about their own lives.

“Sometimes we feel like the way we handle a situation with our children can teach someone how to avoid conflict with their own,” Heidi says.

“And, we’re proud of our family,” Andrew adds.

Structured along the lines of an easy-to-use parenting manual, the book opens with a brief history of the Yellen clan--children, parents and grandparents, Ruth Yellen and her late husband, Al. Known as “Ma and Pa Cookie” because of Al’s long-ago habit of bringing goodies to his grandkids, the senior Yellens inform the story with a down-to-earth wisdom comprised of common sense and respect for others.

Throughout the book, Andrew emphasizes his debt to them, the couple who gave him something rare in contemporary culture: a model for parenthood. He bemoans the fact that, in society at large, “for some reason, after World War II, we lost ‘it’--the ability to pass on parenting skills from one generation to another.”

With the help of first-person chapters written by Yellen’s children and parents, his book aims to bridge that gap and give moms and dads a program for effective family stewardship. Indeed, the warmth and immediacy of the family’s presence contributes a great deal to the book. Their accounts dramatize the effectiveness of Yellen’s parenting strategy--an approach that involves setting up a framework of expectations within the family so that everyone understands his or her obligations to the group.

Advocating the use of a “behavior contract” between parents and children, Yellen offers a system of rewards and “consequences” that, he believes, keeps family disputes to a minimum.

“By structuring your child’s behavior with a contract,” he counsels, “he or she is actually freer to be a child in the truest sense of the phrase. The need for them to test their limits ceases to exist. They can make choices, even if it’s not always the appropriate one.”

Such a program, Yellen says, is the basis for the success of his own family, who remain close despite the fact that Josh now goes to college in Santa Barbara and Ruth lives in Laguna. The worst blow to the clan was Al’s death in December. His battle with prostate cancer, in fact, was what prompted Andrew to write the book he had been mulling over for years.

“This is as much an honor to my whole family as it is a book that can help people parent their children,” Andrew admits. “I wanted my father to see it.”

“The Art of Perfect Parenting” is replete with tales from Yellen family life: disputes over profanity and door-slamming, the usual battles between parent and child, which, in this group’s case, tend to resolve themselves harmoniously.

“Seeing stories about yourself is a bit embarrassing,” Erit says, “but I don’t mind if it’s going to help someone.”

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Early reports would seem to indicate it has. According to Dr. Lance Steinberg, a psychiatrist and pediatrician with offices in Encino, Beverly Hills and Calabasas, “(The book) is clear, precise, funny and sparkles with gems and expertise.”

Dr. Leslie J. Forman, Northridge Hospital’s clinical director for adolescent psychiatric services, says that Yellen’s program allows children to grow as individuals in a structured forum.

Such feedback would probably have warmed the heart of “Pa Cookie,” who was, his family reports, devoted to youngsters. A handwritten letter from him is included at the back of Yellen’s book. In it he concludes, “Successful parenting is life’s greatest reward.”

Where to Go What: Andrew Yellen’s book can be purchased by writing Yellen & Associates, 11260 Wilbur Ave., Suite 303, Northridge, CA 91326. (It also can be ordered through local bookstores.)

Price: $10.95

Call: (818) 360-3078.