Stupid criminal tricks: A CHP officer spotted...

Stupid criminal tricks: A CHP officer spotted a man boldly driving alone in the car-pool lane of the Ventura Freeway and tried to pull him over, Sgt. Ernie Garcia reports. The motorist fled but was involved in a minor accident and placed in handcuffs.

When the suspect was booked, Garcia said, “the officer located $4,550 in cash in (his) pockets along with a note threatening to shoot people if he was not given money.”

Further investigation linked him to a bank robbery that had occurred about five minutes earlier.

Garcia put this incident under the heading of: “Another reason motorists should not abuse the High Occupancy Vehicle Lanes.”

Not to mention another reason motorists should dispose of their used holdup notes.

More deadly than the critics: Newsman Paul McLean noticed a Mid-City billboard for the Jack Nicholson movie “Wolf” alongside a billboard for a werewolf’s worst enemy, the “Silver Bullet” (Coors variety).

It didn’t hurt a bit: Asked to name the highlight of the school year, the kindergartners at Fremont Elementary School in Long Beach gave teacher Irl Noble the expected answers, i.e., recess, cafeteria, science lab. All but Cory Absmeier, who chirped: “Going to the dentist.”

No, he isn’t a pint-sized version of the masochist who rejects anesthesia in “Little Shop of Horrors.” Actually, young Cory was referring to his class’s field trip to observe a local tooth-driller.

But what will they do for the World Series?As Karen Young’s photo illustrates, the folks at the Right Move delivery service got into the spirit of the World Cup by adding a couple of familiar spheroids to their logo.

Melting plot: The era of Raymond Chandler-type L.A. mysteries--with their virtually all-white casts--is over. For a 1990s suspense yarn about the City of Angels to be relevant, it must reflect the diversity of the area, as does “The Killing of the Saints,” by Alex Abella. For instance:

There’s a murder involving a Holocaust survivor (who owns an L.A. jewelry store), his Armenian manager, his Mexican American assistant manager and a black guard who’s an ex-pro football player, as well as a Vietnamese customer and two Cuban gunmen.

Then there’s a Cuban investigator who survives a murder attempt by two Crips (and is treated by an Indian doctor). The investigator is haunted by memories of an ex-girlfriend who ran off with a Colombian drug dealer.

Finally, there’s a trial involving a Chinese American prosecutor and such witnesses as a Mexican disc jockey, a parking lot attendant who says he’s a Guatemalan, a Thai coroner, a Nigerian anthropologist, as well as a courtroom demonstration of a voodoo-like Santeria rite.

Maybe the city, as well as the airport, should be named L.A. International.

Hey, things aren’t that bad in L.A.! A sign posted alongside the Xerox machines in the Downtown Federal Building says:

“No coping after 1:45 p.m.”

We’ve found that when we’re having trouble coping with the afternoon, guzzling a couple of Silver Bullets works wonders.

miscelLAny:

The Hyatt Regency hotel in Downtown L.A. has announced a special “rate of $89 per night (single or double occupancy) for all media covering the O.J. Simpson story.” In the rooms rented to the scribes, the Hyatt would be well advised to hide the keys to the portable refrigerators.