Paterno, Like Holtz, Can Moan and Groan With Best of Them

Before Penn State played USC last Saturday, Nittany Lion Coach Joe Paterno sounded like Lou Holtz in an interview with Gene Collier of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

“I’ll be interested to see the shock, after what our kids experienced last week (a 56-3 rout of Minnesota), of when somebody takes the football with that big, strong offensive line and they start going after our kids. It will be interesting to see how long it will take our kids to adjust.”

The “kids” had adjusted by the coin toss. They led at halftime, 35-0, on their way to a 38-14 victory.

Add USC: It’s possible that Penn State’s 35-0 halftime lead over USC was the largest halftime deficit in Trojan history.

Notre Dame beat USC, 51-0, in 1966 and led at halftime, 31-0. California beat the Trojans, 52-30, in 1990 and led at halftime, 35-7. Research continues.

Trivia time: Who was UCLA’s opponent in its first football game in 1919?

Jingle bells: Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle writes that after Kansas City’s 24-17 victory over the 49ers, Joe Montana’s teammates talked about him as if he were Santa Claus.

“I believe in him,” Kansas City offensive lineman Joe Valerio said. “I’ve believed in him since I was 10 years old. He’s magical.”

No big deal: Casey Candaele, the former Houston Astro infielder now with the triple-A Indianapolis Indians, doesn’t believe there has been a wave of minor league fever since the major league players went on strike.

“It’s more like the 24-hour flu,” he said.”

Optimist: After Livingston, a Division II university in western Alabama, lost its first two games by an average of 63 points, Coach Todd Stroud said:

“When I see eight freshmen starting for us last week on defense, I see the future,” he said. “I see this team getting better real fast.”

For his sake, it had better.

Time to move: Richard Rothschild of the Chicago Tribune, writing on future realignment of NFL divisions, with Dallas most likely remaining in the NFC East:

“Now Dallas is about as Eastern as oil wells and cattle, and every other pro team from Texas plays in either a Central or Western Conference or division.

“A realigned NFC West with Dallas, New Orleans, Arizona, San Francisco and the L.A. Rams makes good geographic and competitive sense.”

Just wondering: Bob Ryan of the Boston Globe: “Was there any morning-after water-cooler talk in your office after England dumped the U.S. soccer team in Wembley Stadium last week?”

Better banter: Raymond Floyd in Senior Golfer magazine on storytelling on the regular and senior tours:

“There are stories in the locker room on the senior tour. The other guys aren’t old enough to have stories yet. They’re still talking about high school football games and things like that. You’ve got a lot of good stories over here.”

Trivia answer: Manual Arts High. UCLA lost, 74-0.

Quotebook: Mike Lupica of Newsday: “There are so many people leaving ‘NYPD Blue,’ I’m starting to wonder if Steven Bochco is operating under a salary cap.”