Rain and Snow Can’t Stop It: Lockout Can

Although a tentative agreement was reached Tuesday night, the NBA lockout lives on, at least until a ratification vote at the end of the month. So no trades, no signings . . . and no fan mail.

That’s right. League officials--following the letter of the law, you might say--have ordered teams to return mail intended for players until the labor dispute is resolved “because you can’t distinguish between fan mail and what could be a player’s personal business unless you open the letters,” NBA spokesman Jan Hubbard said. “There are some aspects that aren’t particularly pleasant of a lockout situation, but that’s what we’re in. You can’t have a half lockout. You have to have a full lockout.”

Sean Warsch, a Florida sixth-grader, found out as much when he wrote to the Miami Heat seeking an autograph from Harold Miner, who was traded to the Cleveland Cavaliers after the season. The Heat sent it back with a form letter explaining the situation.

Warsch got the message, all right.

“I thought it was, like, sort of stupid,” he told the Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel.

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Add mail bonding: Clearly, this isn’t the way to make yourself the favorite sport in America, let alone the world.

“Right now I really, really like the Dolphins because everybody says they’re going to the Super Bowl,” Warsch said. “I can’t wait for football.”

Hear that, NBA players and owners?

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Trivia time: Who leads all active NFL quarterbacks in winning percentage (minimum 10 starts)?

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Golden oldies: Some perspective on the experience of Dick Motta, coach of the Dallas Mavericks:

When he coached his first NBA game--on Oct. 15, 1968--nine of his players from last season hadn’t been born yet and the oldest of the other three was 3.

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Vroom with a view: You’ve heard of life in the fast lane. Now there’s life by the fast lane.

Residents of Tara Place, the 46-unit condominium in Georgia, get 24-hour security, a posh 4,000-foot clubhouse, an exercise center, sauna, Jacuzzi, large swimming pool and tennis courts. Oh, yeah. And they get to dangle over the grandstand at Atlanta Motor Speedway.

Ed Clark, vice president of the track about 30 minutes from downtown, said the condo owners are a mix of racing people, fans and business types who want a place to entertain. This would be the place, especially the two times a year when major NASCAR stops are held in the front yard.

That’s why Dale Earnhardt and Bobby Allison are among the residents who paid between $250,000 and the high $400,000s to live in the complex. Location, location, location.

“The view out the front window is the race,” Allison said.

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Trivia answer: Stan Humphries of the San Diego Chargers, at 31-14 (68.9%).

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Quotebook: Football coach turned TV commentator Jimmy Johnson on the NFL looking to move the American Bowl from Tokyo: “If it’ll make a few bucks for NFL properties, they’ll put it in Iraq with Saddam at fullback.”