TV REVIEW : Bless ‘This House,’ ‘Ned and Stacey,’ but Not ‘Partners’

So-so “Partners” and highly promising “Ned and Stacey” are the two comedies premiering on Fox tonight. And CBS introduces “Bless This House,” an above-average sitcom starring Andrew (no more Dice) Clay.

The threesome comedy “Partners” is especially disappointing given the track record (“Dream On,” “Friends”) of its executive-producer/creators, Jeff Greenstein and Jeff Strauss, and its director, James Burrows (“Cheers,” “Taxi”). Their male protagonists here are a couple of noodles whose antics are much less funny than grating.

Besides working at the same architectural firm, domineering Bob (Jon Cryer) and spineless Owen (Tate Donovan) are best pals. Their friendship wobbles after Owen proposes to his girlfriend, Alicia (Maria Pitillo), leaving the jealous, manipulative Bob to contemplate the grim prospect of eternal bachelorhood as a third wheel. Time to get obnoxious.

The opening script emphasizes sight gags that would make Peter Sellers twist in his grave, and Owen’s marriage proposal and the trio’s bickering over a wedding date are truly Bozo moments.

“Partners” is watchable when the caustic, irredeemable Bob is bequeathed an occasional dart of bent humor, and Cryer has the skill to capitalize on the moments. At its best, though, “Partners” is bad “Seinfeld.”

*

At its best, “Ned and Stacey” is very, very funny, a sort of reverse “Mad About You” from creator/executive producer Michael J. Weithorn (“South Central”) that overcomes a lame premise with witty writing and artful execution. Especially by Thomas Haden Church (“Wings”) as Ned, a smarmy young New York advertising executive who learns that his boss will promote him only if he gets married.

His hurried search for a bride leads to Stacey (Debra Messing), a former blind date who lives with her overbearing parents because she can’t afford a decent place of her own. He’s a predatory phony, she’s an idealist. Despite despising each other, they strike a deal: Stacey can occupy Ned’s spare bedroom if she’ll marry him. It’s so ludicrous that they do it, because, well, this is television.

Your cliche tolerance meter would be exploding at this point, except that many of the lines are such a hoot and Church’s Ned is so effortlessly insincere that you’re hooked almost from the start. An anti-hero par excellence, his trail of victims is such that he can’t even remember them. Her: “I’m the person you exploited without a trace of conscience.” Him: “You’ll have to be more specific.”

Meanwhile, the incompatible newlyweds end their first half-hour with a hint of rising sexual tension, which is fine as long as the reprehensible Ned does not turn out to be a closet softy.

That’s exactly what creator Bruce Helford’s “Bless This House” appears to have in mind for rough-talking Burt Clayton (Clay), a postal supervisor and family man who arrives home from bowling with these words: “Hey, Alice !”

*

Shades of Jackie Gleason’s Ralph Kramden in “The Honeymooners.” Taking no guff from Burt, either, is Cathy Moriarty’s earthy Alice, who chides her 12-year-old daughter (Raegan Kotz) for “staring at your little hooters.” And that amiable lug Burt even has a Nortonesque sidekick named Lenny (Don Stark).

Clay still swaggers and talks, you know, like this ! But this is definitely a new and improved version of the comedian, whose proficient performance here affirms that his shift to situation comedy from movies and provocative stand-up work has succeeded.

Clay gets help from his script. About to chew out two postal workers for dawdling on their coffee break, he first asks them: “Before I get started, is anyone here disgruntled today?”

“Bless This House” doesn’t quite blow you away, but it’s a pleasant half-hour with likable characters and enough start-up humor to make you optimistic about its future.

* “Partners” premieres at 9 tonight, followed by “Ned and Stacey” at 9:30 on Fox (Channel 11). “Bless This House” premieres at 8:30 tonight and thereafter will be seen Wednesdays at 8 p.m. on CBS (Channel 2).