There’s Plenty of Ammunition for the Bullets’ Name Change

The Washington Bullets announced last week that the team is changing its nickname because of its connotation to street violence.

Fans can make suggestions for a new name by submitting their ideas at a restaurant chain in the Baltimore-Washington area. To get the ball rolling, here are a few suggestions:

--Lobbyists (especially useful when dealing with referees).

--Bureaucrats (probably no good because of its connotation to federal government).

--Monuments (perfect for team of slow-footed players).

--Generals (but only if Red Klotz coaches and Globetrotters are put on schedule).

--Apples (team now free to move to Orchard Park).

The new Washington (fill in the blank) make their debut in 1997-98.

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Trivia time: How long have the Bullets had their nickname?

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Yabba Dabba Doo: Put Fred Flintstone behind that wheel and Barney in the pit. Cartoon creator Hanna-Barbera Inc. is joining with Diamond Ridge Motorsports to form something called Wacky Racing Team to field a NASCAR entry next year.

Think the Jetsons would have a fast car?

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Casting call: You think few noticed when Greg Harris of the Montreal Expos pitched both left-handed and right-handed in a game last season? Hollywood was watching. Beverly Hills-based Tom Cole Productions, which was looking for twins to star in an upcoming syndicated TV comedy about twins who pitch called “Lefty and Righty,” wound up casting Harris in both roles.

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Heard about O’Leary’s cow? Chicago Tribune columnist Mike Royko wrote this about NFL franchises moving: “Consider this: Los Angeles, the nation’s second-biggest city, has recently lost two NFL teams. Yet there has never been even a hint that the Packers would leave Green Bay, a city with fewer residents than L.A. has rioters.”

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Really, Mike? You have heard nothing about the Packers moving basically because it can’t happen. The Packers are a publicly owned corporation with 1,898 shareholders, most of them average people in Wisconsin.

There is zero chance they would ever vote for a move.

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Stuffed with what? Ross Atkin’s story on Oksana Baiul for the Christian Science Monitor said the Ukrainian figure skater speaks English much better than when she moved to the United States a year ago.

But some expressions are lost on her, Atkin reported.

Oksana: “I cook a lot. I love to cook.”

Reporter: “What is the specialty of the house?”

Oksana: “I don’t know. Probably my bedroom, which is where I keep all my stuffed animals.”

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Trivia answer: For 33 seasons, since 1963 when the franchise moved to Baltimore from Chicago, where they were the Packers for a season and the Zephyrs for a season.

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Quotebook: Charles Barkley on the New York Knicks: “They couldn’t score in an empty gym by themselves half the time.”