THE NBA / MARK HEISLER : Oh Canada? Oh Boy Is More Like It for New Pair

In the War of 1812, the United States tried to annex Canada, but our offensive was repulsed and the British wound up burning Washington, D.C.

In a classic case of payback, the NBA is now sacking Canada.

Picture this: Toronto and Vancouver are charged $125 million-- apiece --for franchises. The expansion price the last time around, in 1989, was $32.5 million. That’s a jump of almost 400% in six years. The NBA has, once again, outpaced the cost of living.

The new teams got to choose everyone’s ninth-best players, but that didn’t count free agents--even ones such as the Lakers’ retiring Sam Bowie--so it was more like the 10th or 11th best. Wily general managers went so far as to cut such players as Rafael Addison, obliging the Raptors to take pricey disappointments such as Oliver Miller.

That, however, was a small-potatoes scam next to the league’s piece de resistance, the draft exclusions.

The Raptors and Grizzlies were allowed to draft sixth and seventh. In comparison, the NFL let the Carolina Panthers and Jacksonville Jaguars go 1-2.

But no league had ever come up with anything like this one: Neither new NBA team can draft first in 1996 . . . or 1997 . . . or 1998.

“Yes, it is [unfair],” Raptor General Manager Isiah Thomas says, cheerfully. “However, that’s the way it is. I don’t want to cry about it. I’m not going to complain about it. Before I came into the ownership group, the deal was made.”

At last season’s All-Star game, Deputy Commissioner Russ Granik delivered the official rationalization, even asserting the NBA was being generous. Actually, no league has ever stuck it to a new partner like this. The Dallas Mavericks (Mark Aguirre), Charlotte Hornets (Larry Johnson) and Orlando Magic (Shaquille O’Neal, Chris Webber, who was traded for Penny Hardaway) all exercised top picks within their first three seasons and became legitimate teams.

Too legitimate, apparently.

Thomas says the league’s argument, as he understands it, went this way: “When players like Shaquille O’Neal and Penny Hardaway went to what had been an expansion team, the other owners felt it diminished the value of their franchises.”

Thomas laughs.

“I wish I had been there to argue with them.”

Thomas ultimately pulled off a coup in the college draft, taking Damon Stoudamire, who will be his point guard for years while he phases out veterans such as Alvin Robertson who have helped the Raptors start so well.

The Grizzlies won their first two games, then lost 19 in a row. On the bright side, prize rookie Bryant Reeves has revived after a terrible start.

The Raptors (21,563) and Grizzlies (17,120) are Nos. 3 and 11 in the league in attendance, respectively. In comparison, the Lakers and Clippers are Nos. 26 and 29.

Indignities are everywhere. The Raptors heard the Canadian anthem mangled in Indianapolis. In Seattle it was so bad, even the players nudged each other.

On the Grizzlies’ first trip to the Forum, Laker officials forgot the Canadian anthem entirely.

Then there was the first Chicago Bull trip to Vancouver, where excitement was running at a fever pitch. The local press, used to polite hockey players, was disappointed to learn Coach Phil Jackson wouldn’t return phone calls, and Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen and Dennis Rodman wouldn’t talk after practice.

“Arrogance comes in a good many packages,” the Vancouver Province’s Tony Gallagher fumed, “but some of the proctological specimens on the Chicago Bulls have honed it to an art form.”

Welcome to the NBA, oh, Canada! Look at the bright side: In four years or so, you get to sock it to Mexico City.

Internationalism, it’s definitely the way to go.

SHAQ’S IN THE HOUSE; EVERYONE’S HAPPY (?)

O’Neal is back, but the Magic went 17-5 without him and Hardaway became a star, so now what happens?

“I’ve heard that question 100 times now,” guard Nick Anderson said. “Shaq is going to do what Shaq has always done. Nick Anderson will do what he’s done and Penny Hardaway . . . and so on. There will be no problems. OK?”

Hardaway said only, “I don’t think I’ll have to change my game at all.” This was not the same as saying, “We’re just happy to have our big guy back, and we all know our team starts with him.”

Teammates’ eyebrows were raised when O’Neal informed management he was leaving town during his convalescence to visit Los Angeles and New York. Horace Grant, who used to bust on Michael Jordan in Chicago for the same thing, acknowledged there was a “double standard,” but said it was OK.

Shaq’s return was routine. The well-known media hype engaged Coach Brian Hill in a fake argument for TV cameras. Hill said Shaq would play Friday, O’Neal interjected “Wednesday,” Shaq left and Hill said, grinning, “I guess it’s Wednesday.”

Shaq then went out through a back door without further comment. He told a Magic PR assistant he was concerned about overexposure.

NAMES AND NUMBERS

You don’t tug on Superman’s cape (cont.): Hardaway outdueled Jordan in Orlando, but Jordan spanked him last week in the Bulls’ victory in Chicago. “I came in a little more motivated,” Jordan said. “I’d be crazy if I didn’t come in here to really redeem myself in terms of the way I played that first game.” . . . The Bulls started the weekend with a two-game lead over Orlando in the real race, for best record in the East. The Bulls’ 19-2 start is their best, ahead of the 18-3 in 1991-92 when they won 65. . . . This time they’re really through: The Mavericks put on long faces when Roy Tarpley tested positive for alcohol, but the truth is they were delighted he voided a contract that had five years left at $23 million. Tarpley had hoped to return under John Lucas, then in San Antonio, but kindly Maverick owner Don Carter wouldn’t trade him, gave him the new deal, and hired Dick Motta--who made no secret of his disdain for Tarpley. “This was just a bum deal for me to ever come back,” Tarpley said. “I never even wanted to play here again. They’re out of my contract. That’s what they’ve wanted all along, from what I hear.” . . . A commercial star is born: Nike says Hardaway’s “Air Penny” shoe is the second-best selling basketball shoe ever, behind the Air Jordan line.

Warming up in Milwaukee: Three years after he left the Lakers for a sweetheart eight-year, $12-million deal, Mike Dunleavy is under pressure from Buck owner Sen. Herb Kohl. Dunleavy is so desperate, he traded for Benoit Benjamin and Kevin Duckworth but still is fielding a defensive sieve. “I know it reflects on me as a coach,” Dunleavy said. “I understand that.” Benjamin arrived shortly after Duckworth, who already had his trademark 00. Said Duckworth when Benjamin asked him to give it up: “No way. I told him I have credentials behind me.” Comment: He’s got a lot more than that behind him. . . . Sharp but volatile Doug Collins is taking longer to turn the Detroit Pistons around than he expected and showing signs of distress even earlier than expected. “Would you guys write that I tell them to take the ball to the basket?” he asked reporters after the Pistons blew a big lead over the Lakers at Auburn Hills. “Help me a little bit. Write, ‘Coach is telling them to take it to the basket and don’t settle for jump shots,’ so people will know that I’m telling them that.” . . . Amid reports a coaching change was near, Sun President Jerry Colangelo had Paul Westphal in for a chat. The Suns have long operated one of the last country clubs, taking frequent days off and allowing veterans to skip the drills they do hold. Westphal says from now on venerable Charles Barkley and oft-injured Kevin Johnson have to practice if they want to start, since the only time the first unit is together “is in front of 19,000 people.” Said Barkley, after home losses to Miami, in which Alonzo Mourning played only 18 minutes, and Charlotte: “I have to laugh just to keep from crying.”

Replacement officials went out in style in Portland, ruling Arvydas Sabonis’ late shot good, giving the Trail Blazers a 103-101 double-overtime victory over the Rockets. The NBA’s Rod Thorn acknowledged the mistake, but judgment calls can’t be overruled. . . . Magnificent donkey: Jake O’Donnell was taken down hard last spring when the league quietly sidelined him through the playoffs for his conduct in ejecting Clyde Drexler. However, he was the last of the great old-time referees, who called a game his way and made sure the visitors got a fair break. “You could talk and joke with him,” Westphal said, “and he could still maintain order. He had the sense that the game was still a game.” . . . Kevin Costner was introduced to Hakeem Olajuwon after a recent game by a Rocket official who explained, “Kevin’s a big movie star.” Asked Olajuwon, politely: “Oh really?” Olajuwon explained later to teammates: “I don’t watch much TV.” . . . So much for the honeymoon: Derrick Coleman averaged 22 points and 12 rebounds in his first two games with the Philadelphia 76ers, sprained an ankle in his third and isn’t expected back soon. “We were afraid of this because of his weight,” said Coach John Lucas, adding Coleman is “something of a baby when it comes to pain.” Coleman is incommunicado, responding to questions with grunts. . . . New Jersey Net Coach Butch Beard on the departures of Coleman, Benjamin, Chris Morris and Dwayne Schintzius: “We don’t have guys that want to work 15 minutes, be hurt 15 minutes, coach the team 15 minutes and be general manager the rest of the day.” . . . New 76er Scott Skiles, who signed for the $225,000 minimum, to Coleman: “Derrick, do you realize I’m playing for less money than you played for in college?”

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Grisly Streak

The Vancouver Grizzlies ‘ victory Friday night ended their misery for now, but their 19-game losing streak is still one of the longest in history. A look: *--*

Streak Team Date 24 Cleveland Cavaliers March 9-Nov. 5, 1982 21 Detroit Pistons March 7-Oct. 22, 1982 20 Philadelphia 76ers Jan. 9-Feb. 11, 1972 20 Dallas Mavericks Nov. 13-Dec. 22, 1993 19 Vancouver Grizzlies Nov. 7-Dec. 14, 1995 19 Dallas Mavericks Feb. 6-March 15, 1993 19 Clippers Dec. 30, ‘88-Feb. 6, ’89 19 Clippers March 11-April 13, 1982 19 Philadelphia 76ers March 21-Nov. 10, 1972 17 Miami Heat Nov. 5-Dec. 12, 1988 17 Orlando Magic Dec. 4, ‘91-Jan. 8, ’92

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