Conversation

Parents and school personnel often find themselves in disagreement about how children should be educated and treated, especially if the parents’ own experiences with school were unpleasant. JACKIE ROBINSON, president of PEACE, a parent-child advocacy organization in South-Central Los Angeles, talked with TRIN YARBOROUGH about the problem and the work of her group.

School officials and teachers talk a lot about how much they want parents to get involved. But often, it seems, what they really want is to have parents help with candy-selling drives or to enforce rules and goals the school wants. They don’t want parents to question them or raise issues of their own. It’s an adversarial relationship and some schools would rather sabotage parent involvement than give up total control.

School can be a place of anxiety or even fear for parents, especially if they had bad experiences with school when they were growing up. African American parents who use ebonics (so-called black English) may feel particularly uncomfortable talking to teachers because often they’re treated as if they are stupid. Some teachers even interrupt them and correct their English. It’s insulting and intimidating. And it puts up barriers that prevent the parent from taking part in his child’s education.

One problem that African Americans face is the large number of grandparents raising their grandchildren because the children’s parents are on drugs, in prison or have met with some personal tragedy. Most grandparents aren’t familiar with new teaching methods, course contents, home study requirements and school system programs. So it’s much harder for them to help a child and build that child’s self-esteem.

That’s why some parents and grandparents just drop their kids off at school, and then go into denial about what goes on there. But when they do that, they’re accepting the role of victim and the belief that they don’t have the power to change things. They need to stay strong and deal with the fear of being attacked or belittled. If they take the easy way out, they may be abandoning their child to a system that doesn’t have his best interests at heart.

A year ago, I founded PEACE for African American parents at several schools in South-Central L.A. As I got more and more involved with schools, I saw things that made me walk away in tears. I realized I was feeling the way a child feels when he’s facing powerful figures like teachers and principals, with no one understanding and helping him, and I saw that you can’t truly lead unless you’re in touch with the feelings of those you represent. That has kept me motivated.

A major goal of PEACE is to encourage parents to speak out. Our group is really dedicated, with a lot of terrific volunteers. So far we’ve contacted about 750 families and have regular phone contact with about 100. A small group of parents and kids meets every other week. We’ve worked with phonics, tutored parents, brought in a black woman artist to teach creativity and had a psychologist come to do counseling because we don’t always trust the school counselors. We’ve gone into some homes and told the parents to turn off the TV and help with homework. We feel it’s very important to create a sort of community village of African American families in which the kids are supported and protected. There’s a lot of healing in becoming comfortable with your own culture. And it leads to loving and encouraging others in your group.

African Americans especially need this kind of support because they score at the bottom of the heap in every academic rating. Some teachers and administrators and even other kids may have a whole set of negative beliefs toward even the nicest and smartest African American kids and parents. Those beliefs can lead them to assume those kids will do poorly--kids who say “dat” instead of “that” may get put into special ed, for instance. But if children get reprimanded or shamed for every tiny thing they do wrong and get screamed at for something like losing their lunch ticket, they can get too petrified even to defend themselves. In that kind of atmosphere, a child can’t learn, because intact self-esteem is at the core of all learning.

Kids can accept punishment if it’s fair, but if it’s unfair they’ll begin to act out or just shut down. Parents have to listen respectfully to their children’s viewpoint and not just take the word of a teacher or administrator and holler all the way home. We parents have to realize that it’s our school and our children, and we need to investigate everything that’s going on. We must believe we have the right to ask questions. We must refuse to be intimidated and demand respect.

In 1991, a program was established by federal mandate giving major funding to schools that establish councils to promote parental involvement in schools. The councils include parents and teachers and decide how to budget up to $500,000 in federal funds and vote on many significant policies and programs. The LAUSD has a department called Parent Community Services to train parents and teachers and establish a parent involvement center at each school. But officials at some schools appoint parents to the council, rather than having them elected by other parents. Parents who don’t get involved feel as if their child is being taken away from them, with the school becoming his surrogate parent. It’s definitely a power struggle.