Toys for the Animal in You, Too

Bill has the big hair. Newt has the big gut. And Ross? Well, the enormity of his ears is matched only by the brevity of his teensy brown wingtipped feet.

As a metaphor for the great cat-and-mouse game that is modern American politics, this trio of catnip stuffed pols has an important public service message for voters and their pets: Let’s play!

They are the Political Animals line of “kitty activation toys” from Fat Cat Inc., a catnip and humor company created by and for baby boomers with cats. And, as the presidential campaign drones on and on, they are giving a word-weary electorate something better to talk about.

Here’s the incumbent, with package insert that reads: “See Bill Run. . . . Whether he’s in the White House or in your house, passing this BILL intact won’t be easy, not one has ever made it out of a kitty conference without a few, uh, amendments.” Seven inches tall, before amendments.

And here is “Newt Hoot. . . . Recent polls indicate a surprising majority of Americans just do not realize that the true speaker of the house is YOUR CAT.” Seven inches tall.

Ready for a change? Here’s “Toss Perot. . . . This twangy guy with the honkin’ big ears is just the right size to toss around. Pointer, graphs and charts sold separately.” Six-and-a-half inches tall.

Back at Fat Cat headquarters in Colchester, Vt., artist Anne Lika and husband John are shipping out the cat toys as fast as their crafters can make them. “From the moment we sent out the Political Animal series, we sensed they would share a special destiny,” recalls John. Indeed, one of the first recipients of a Newt cat toy was Socks of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

While some of the toys have been intercepted--and yes, even abused--by humans interested in them only for their use in making political statements, the Likas like to believe that most of the dolls are being used as intended.

That is to say, by cats. By cats who hurl them against doors, toss them down stairs, puncture them with their claws, rip them with their teeth and chomp off their heads.

Looking at the phenomenon more holistically, Lika has perceived a certain catnip Zen emerging from his playful products. “What’s interesting is the consumer is relating to the toy and then the cat is relating to the toy afterward and then the consumer is relating to the cat relating to the toy. So you see a circle is being completed somehow. . . .”

That the average play life of these toys is just over nine months is testimony to their sturdy canvas covers. The fact that customers are asking for new models is testimony to political tides.

Something approaching a groundswell has been building for a strong yet floppy Hillary doll. And never-say-die liberals and their arch opposites would love to see a Ralph Nader doll--green clad as the Green Party’s pick for president.

Most troubling, though, concede the Likas, are the ever-increasing numbers of requests the company continues to receive for a Bob Dole doll.

“Numbers or not, polls or no polls, Dole’s just not going to make it into the lineup,” John Lika says. “We didn’t do Dole when we launched the rest of the Political Animal series last year because we didn’t think he was going to win.

“But, we’re not doing Dole because, the bottom line is, he just doesn’t have the excitement you need for a good pet toy. There’s just nothing to play with there. . . .”