Not seen and not heard:An invitation to...

Not seen and not heard:

An invitation to the American Teacher Awards, scheduled for Dec. 8 at the Pantages Theater, ends with the admonition: “Please, no children under the age of 10.”

TALK ABOUT LONG-TERM PARKING: Terry Zeoli and Trace Keasler each sent us a snapshot of a mortuary that seems destined to have parking-space problems as the years pass by.

WHAT KIND OF OUTFITS DO THE WORKERS WEAR? Laura G. Nagle found a sign at a pizza joint that seemed more appropriate for Halloween.

FOR THE SPORTS FAN WHO HAS EVERYTHING: Items of local interest that will be on the block Dec. 6-7 at Leland’s Champions Live Auction in New York City (with their “estimated value”):

* The 1979 Rose Bowl ring of USC star Charles White . . . $1,500-$2,000 (Incidentally, this item went on the block before USC’s sixth straight loss to UCLA on Saturday.)

* The 1984 All-Star ring of former Dodger Manager Tommy Lasorda . . . $1,000-$1,500

* The 1982 Lakers championship ring of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar . . . $2,000-$3,000

* A check signed by Hall of Famer Ty Cobb “made out to the California Water Service. Framed with great original wire photo.” . . . $400--$500

* Two autographed Joe DiMaggio photos (“The photos themselves are the real thing. Signatures of DiMaggio, Marilyn Monroe and Lefty O’Doul allegedly forged by a family member, causing serious problems.”) . . . $600--$800

* The “family room pool table” of the late Dodger star Gil Hodges, “spent over 35 years in the Hodges’ home.” . . . $1,200-$1,500

And, one of the least-expensive items in the catalog:

* Buffalo Bills “outstanding player award” to O.J. Simpson . . . $200-$300

THE RUINS OF TROY: After our foolhardy football prediction of last week, Gersten Schachne e-mailed us the following: “So, UCLA stood NO chance of defeating USC? Eat crow, Steve. I hope you learned a good lesson Saturday--that is, never bet against UCLA when they are not favored to beat USC.”

The underdog does seem to win often in this series. Anyway, we’re confident the Trojan footballers will one day emerge victorious over the Bruins--if not this century, then the next.

And we’ve decided not to auction off our USC ring, for now.

miscelLAny:

Las Pulgas Road in affluent Pacific Palisades translates as “Road of the Fleas.” Early land-grant maps used the phrase “Las Pulgas,” according to the book, “Street Names of Pacific Palisades & Other Tales.” “Fleas were mentioned by the early settlers and even plagued the Indians, who burned old houses to kill the insects and rebuilt elsewhere.” There you have it--the original tear-downs of the Southland real estate market.